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I wanted to tell him I understood, that I would try, but the words got lodged in my throat. We were in the fort of honesty, and any agreement would be the exact opposite of that: a lie.
How could I be whole, or even pretend to be, when two pieces of my soul were missing and one was dead?
“Can I ask you something?” I whispered back.
His body twitched at my obvious avoidance of his request, but he gave me a nod.
“Why did you reject me in the bathroom? Do you not want to kiss me?” I waited for his answer, breath held, but he remained silent. The only indication he had heard my question was the tightening of his fingers on my waist.
Of course, that was when awkward Adelaide came out to play. And awkward Adelaide liked to talk about random shit.
“Is it because I kissed your brother? Because I don’t regret it. I kissed Calax, too. And Tamson. And I said the L-word to Fallon. Oh gosh. Do you think I’m easy? Because my vagina is not a hussy, despite contrary belief. The sign officially says closed for business. Unless your name is Fallon, Calax, Ryder, Ronan, Declan, Tamson, or Asher. If that is your name, then the doors are open. Well...not if that’s your name, because I’m sure there are plenty of men with names like Ryder and Asher. What I’m saying is, not just anyone is allowed access to the water slide, if you know what I mean. My vagina is a coveted dessert. A la cremé pussy milk. Is that a thing? Hmm...now that I’m thinking about it, all vaginas should have a name. And since mine is a shameless hussy when it comes to you guys, I’m just going to call my pussy Elena. Or is that weird? Can I name my vagina after your ex-girlfriend?”
“I’m just going to stop you now,” Ronan said with barely contained laughter. My face paled when I realized what I had said.
What. The. Fuck?
“I want to say sorry,” I began slowly, “but I can’t remember what exactly I said, so you aren’t getting an apology. I can give you anal instead.”
He choked on air.
“Wait. Do girls not offer to give guys anal?”
“Addie, just stop talking.” His hand snaked up to cover my mouth. Instinctively, my tongue darted out to lick the blistered skin, and goosebumps rose on his muscular arms.
“Shit, woman, you’re going to fucking kill me.” He took a deep breath, nuzzling his face against my neck. I canted my head sideways to give him better access. “I don’t even know where to begin after all that, but to start off, you’re not fucking naming your vagina Elena. Elena is going nowhere near your...girl part.”
“Isn’t that every guy’s dream?” I mused, chuckling silently at his inability to say pussy. “To watch two girls together?”
Before I had even finished speaking, Ronan shook his head vehemently. “No.”
“No?”
“You’re ours, Princess. Only ours.” His voice was a growl, eyes uncharacteristically cold. I couldn’t help but squirm in pleasure at the possessive, carnal hunger in his expression. “No one else can touch you. Which leads me to my second point.”
“Which is?”
Suddenly, so suddenly that I squealed, Ronan rearranged me so that I was straddling him, one leg on either side of his muscular thighs.
His eyes entrapped me, holding me hostage, but I was a willing captive.
“You’re mine, Addie. You have been from the first stupid ass joke. You just didn’t know it yet.” He leaned forward until his breath fanned over my lips. “Addie...I thought you realized it already. I love you, crazy girl. I love you so damn much that it terrifies me. I open my eyes, and all I want to see is you. I close them, and you’re a part of every dream I have. I love you. I fucking love-”
I crushed my lips to his, reveling in his moan of pleasure. My hands curled around his neck, pulling him even closer to me, as his own hands tangled in my hair. He kissed me with a feverish intensity, the euphoric air nearly palpable.
It was Ronan who pulled away first, pressing a sweet kiss on the corner of my lips.
“Lucky Charms?”
“Yes, Princess?”
“I love you too.”
He pulled me towards him once more, and our lips and tongues eagerly resumed their dance. This time, it was me who pulled away, breaths motoring in and out and heart hammering.
“You love me?” Ronan’s voice was a hushed murmur. A whisper. A breath of air, as if he could scarcely believe that someone like me could love someone like him.
Didn’t he see how wrong he was? How beautiful and gentle his soul was, lighting up the darkest pieces of me?
