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I stared up at him. "Because," I started, "I feel like that's what you guys are waiting for—a decision. You want me to make a choice between you, and I don't know that I can. You and Bellamy and Knix and Texas have been friends for years. If I choose any one of you then how do you think the others are going to feel? How would you feel if when we saw them next, I said that I wanted to dateKnix?"
His jaw clenched, his eyes turning fiery and molten. "Is that what you want?" he askedslowly.
I shook my head. "I'm not making a decision right now," I huffed. "I'm asking if, hypothetically, I did choose one of the others and it wasn't you, how would youfeel?"
Marv blew out a breath. "Well, yeah, I wouldn't likeit."
I nodded. "Would you ever be able to work with me and whoever I choose and not getjealous?"
"I..." He trailed off, looking at me as if searching for the answer I wanted. That was the problem, though—the answer I wanted, neither of us had. "I'd have to get over it?" He formed the statement as though it was a question and grimaced as though he didn't like thethought.
"That's it then?" I asked. "You and two others would have to just 'get over it'? Am I that easy to 'getover'?"
"That's not what I meant," he replied, his brows lowering to form a crevice between them. "I mean that we'd just have to accept yourdecision."
"And if you couldn't?" My heart hammered in my chest. "I don't know if I could get over it if you were choosing between me andoneother girl much less three orfour."
"So, what then?" he asked, frustration clear in his tone. "You want me to just choose youandthese hypotheticalgirls?"
I flinched. That wasn't what I was saying. I was just trying to make a point and show him how difficult this was for me. It wasn't as easy as he and the guys seemed to think it was. They seemed to think that I could just spend time with all of them and thenBam!I'd have a decision made. But then I thought about it. If Marv had to choose between me and other girls, what would I do? Would I just give up and walk away because he hadn't chosen me right off the bat? Or would I do somethingelse?
"Maybe," I began, "maybe I'd be okay if you had me." I swallowed roughly. "And if you couldn't choose, at least I'd know that I, at least, had some part of you." I pulled away from him and his shocked expression and turned back down the path. "But that's never going to happen, so let's justgo."
