AllFreeNovel
Share Us
That damn bottle. Promising so much. All I have to do is take a sip, which will be easier to deal with. Just one sip will inevitably lead to another. Eventually, I’ll be able to forget.
“Why?” she prompts. “If not now, when can I see her?
“She has been through a lot recently. I think we should give her some time to adjust before we throw something else at her.”
“I guess you know her better than I do.”
Do I? On paper, certainly. I’ve actually come face-to-face with her recently, unlike her mother. That isn’t the same as really knowing someone. “First things first, did it never occur to you that you could reach out to me? Let me know you were alive?”
I know what she’s about to say before she says a word. All it takes is her faint chuckle. “How was I supposed to know you would care? The last time I came to you, your friend almost raped me while you were passed out in the living room.”
Fuck.
“Were you even aware that I was supposedly dead?”
“Yes. I’ve known for a while.”
“Lucas, I’m sorry about that. I really am.”
“I wish you would have told my brother about your pregnancy. He could have helped you.”
“I thought about it. But I wasn’t sure if I could trust him, and let’s be honest with each other. Would you have wanted a baby? Think back to who you were then. I understand you’ve come a long way but try to remember.”
I do remember, and it isn’t as difficult as she might think. I’ve come a long way. Maybe I have, but I’ve also slipped back quite a bit. I’m more in touch with that side of myself than I’ve been in a long time, maybe because I’m not pretending he doesn’t exist the way I tried before.
And no, that version of me had no interest in being a father. “I know you’re right. I’m sorry you didn’t think you could tell me about her.”
“More than anything, I don’t want you to think I’ve been gallivanting around Europe, avoiding my responsibilities.”
“I don’t think I could ever imagine you doing something like that.” Me, on the other hand? It’s a lot easier to imagine.
“I miss her. I really would like to see her as soon as possible. She needs a mother in her life, and I’ve needed her all this time.”
“Why don’t you let me talk to her first? I don’t think it would do her any favors, her birth mother appearing out of the blue. She deserves a warning, at least. Some time to process it.” Right now, I know all about being given no time to process things. I’m still trying to wrap my head around the conversation I’m having with this woman. She’s alive. My past, alive and well after all this time. Yet another reminder of who I used to be.
“I’m sure you’re right. She doesn’t need me showing up and upsetting her. But please, could you talk to her soon? I hate to be pushy, but…”
“I get it.” I need to get off the phone. I need to drink this away. I can’t stand how thirsty I suddenly feel.
“Thank you. You don’t know how much it means to hear you say that.”
“I’ll get back to you soon—”
“Wait! Don’t hang up yet. I just want to know… is she happy? I mean, now, at Corium?”
“Yes. I think she is happy here. She wasn’t at first, but now she is with Quinton, and he treats her well.”
“I’m glad.” Charlotte sighs, and I can hear the relief in her voice.
“Where can I reach you?” She gives me her number, and I promise to call as soon as I’ve had the discussion with Aspen. Then I have to hang up. I can’t keep it together anymore.
Alive. All this time, she’s been alive.
How am I supposed to tell Aspen about this? Where do I begin? I’m nobody’s idea of cool or calm, and tact has never been my strong suit. There’s nothing to prepare me for this. I’ll find a way to fuck it up, I’m sure.
I can’t believe how much I care about how she’ll take this. I want to do the right thing by her, which means forgetting about my apprehension, getting over how awkward and painful this will be, and finding a way to frame this in a positive light. She thought she’d lost her parents, and now she has them both back. We might not be what she bargained for, but there’s plenty of time to make up for the years we’ve lost.
All I can do is hope she’ll buy it.
