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My stomach gurgled in preparation for the delicious food we were going to dine on tonight.
Shadow grabbed a cloth and wrapped it over his hands. “Tell the workers they’re finishing early today and to get clean and put on their best gear, for tonight, they feast and dance!”
How wonderful.My father had only celebrated the start and end of harvest, the Sea God’s holiday, and Winter Solstice with his workers. He’d said it had kept spirits high.
The man’s face lit up, and he put his hat back on then tipped it at Shadow. “Thank you, boss,” he said, before disappearing back out the door.
All of this reminded me of home, making my heart pine for it. Admiration swelled in my chest. A man with such high regard for his staff, one who treated them to celebrations and supported those with families, was a rare find. An overwhelming urge arose in me, propelled by the old Snow, making me long to lean over and kiss his lips. Before I knew it, I’d bent toward him.
He glanced into my eyes, and his irises sparked green with a panther’s desire. That spark in my chest exploded. Lips parted, he craned his neck toward me.
No. Absolutely not.I couldn’t fall for this shifter. Whatever mutual attraction we had was based on lies. What would he think of me when he discovered the truth about me? That I’d brought danger to his lands, to his family, to his workers? From all appearances, this man valued honesty and integrity—and rewarded it. Anything between us couldn’t go any further. Before our lips connected, I pulled away.
He reached for me, as if to pull me back. His hands hovered an inch above my flesh, flexed, and then fell to his sides and clenched. He let out a long and frustrated sigh and turned back to the latest loaf of bread, resting the tin on top of the stove to keep it warm.
My insides burned. More than anything, I’d wanted to kiss him. But I was too scared. Frightened he’d discover my lies. Frightened he’d hurt me or turn me over to my stepmother. Frightened to get too close, to trust him.
***
As dusk settledover the plantation, all the workers, along with Shadow’s parents and his brother and sister, sat down to dine.
An awkward silence had settled between Shadow and me after the almost-kiss. He’d busied himself filling ceramic containers with butter and cheese, while I’d set goblets, plates, and utensils on the tables.
We sat at one table, and after a brief introduction to his family, his father—a man in his mid-fifties with gray-streaked hair and a proud face—placed a hand on Shadow’s shoulder, asking, “Would you do the honors, son?”
“Certainly, Father.” Shadow took his wine goblet, stood, and lifted it in the air.
The babble in the room hushed.
“Thank you all for your tremendous efforts today,” he said. “Without you, we wouldn’t have a plantation, wouldn’t be able to support so many panther families, and we wouldn’t have a bustling trade. Here’s to all of you.” He jabbed the glass higher then lowered it to take a sip of wine.
The energy in the room surged. Everyone cheered and toasted, their goblets clinking. Metal plates scraped on the wood as shifters tucked into their meals. Bread crunched as people smothered thick slices in butter. Spoons ladled at the stew, and some sly slurps and burps escaped.
But I didn’t care one bit. This place reminded me so much of home. Of family and unity. My heart soared, being part of it all, making me realize how much I missed this type of connection.
All throughout dinner, Shadow stole glances at me, and his family smiled at each other, as if they noticed his interest in me.
Guilt wormed deeper into my heart and ate away at it like a slug consuming an apple. Tomorrow, I’d be gone, possibly never to return. He didn’t even know my real name or my true history. All I’d offered were lies, yet he’d shown me absolute kindness and had brought me into his world. I didn’t deserve this. The idea of him discovering the truth, of his disappointment, his anger, it was more than I could bear. Why did I feel so strongly about this? About him! Where was my mind lately? I was a jumbled mass of confusion.
Once dinner was finished, one of the plantation workers moved to the back of the room and picked up a guitar resting against the wall. He sat down and began to strum a few chords. Someone whistled, and a few more workers joined the musician, one on the drum, another on the tambourine, and a third on the violin. Half the room stood up and cheered.
I glanced at Shadow, receiving a warm and bright smile in return that caused my heart to buzz.
One of the men up front commenced an uplifting song, and the band responded with music to accompany the tune about the panther goddess. Many in the room swayed, throwing their arms around each other, singing along as if the song were some sort of anthem.
The notes vibrated in my chest. The lyrics were so beautiful, telling of a journey from peril and darkness to love and light. The story somewhat echoed my transition…just juxtaposed.
When the next song, a cheery melody, began, many of the workers got up to dance, some by themselves, others partnering up.
Shadow turned to me. “Would the mysterious beauty do me the honor?”
My stomach squeezed. It had been a very long time since I’d danced with a man. I wasn’t sure I even remembered how. The idea of close contact terrified me. Him holding my hands. Me unable to escape.
The old Snow shoved me aside, taking over, and I watched as she accepted his hand, and he lead her onto the floor.
Nerves in our body exploded at his touch. He put one hand firmly at my waist and clutched my hand with his, lifting it to shoulder level as he rocked me, spinning us slowly on the floor. Our closeness, his musky scent, the faint odor of ale on his breath was all too much. My mind danced in a haze of desire. I was so close to letting my walls down.
The old Snow let out a playful laugh. “What I lack in culinary skills I make up for in dance ability.”
