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I take a step back, moving closer to the house to give them their privacy.
“I hope you know what you’re doing,” a voice says behind me.
I turn to face Derek, water bottle in tow and sweat pouring down the side of his face. It’s January, but we’ve been lifting large slats of wood and drywall in enclosed spaces with no A/C all afternoon.
“What am I doing?”
“That’s what I’d like to know. She’s your student, isn’t she? Can’t you just wait until she graduates to do this?” Derek’s face reveals no emotion at all. Though the tone in his voice echoes more of a warning than a scolding.
“Look, I brought her here to talk to Marianne,” I explain. “It’s good for her to know how a charity is run and all that goes into getting it started.”
“Sure. Because you don’t have any ulterior motives for asking her here.”
My eyes dart to the side, delivering their most effective silencing scowl before speaking. “I know what I’m doing.”
“You’d better. Because you’re not the only one who’s going to get hurt when all of this goes south.” Derek pauses. His eyes take in the interaction between Aly and Miles. What is he thinking about? Even Marianne let up with the guilt after the first three hours. “She’s better than the last few girls you brought home, I’ll give you that. I mean, they were fine, but she’s a little more than what you need right now.”
“What does that mean?”
Derek claps a hand over my shoulder. “You need someone down to earth. Someone who grounds you. Like Marianne does with me. She makes me want to do better. Be better. You kinda lost your way there for a little while. But…”
He pauses. His hand slides off my shoulder, and he downs the remaining swallows of water in the bottle. “I want to see you doing more of this. You used to help out all the time. So if she makes you want to do that, I’m happy for you, man. Just be careful.”
I rub my palm along the back of my neck.
Be careful?
How much more careful can I be without completely shutting Aly out altogether? She’s still my student. I still need to help her with her proposal. Just because we are out doing things together that relate to that proposal doesn’t mean someone will automatically suspect an affair. We act completely indifferent to one another while we’re on campus. Even our last two classes together, we carried on as if nothing had happened between us. I delivered my lecture, only glanced in her direction once or twice. No wild and racy thoughts scaled the fortress of my mind there.
Anywhere else we’ve ever been together, no one could mistake our acquaintance for anything more than that. Except for the club. Perhaps I had crossed a line. But what else was I supposed to do?
Keep my distance at all costs?
Not a chance.
Chapter Thirteen
Aly
The drive home is unbearable.
We both ride in silence, his eyes focused on the road ahead of him, mine trained out the side passenger window. Neither one of us has mentioned anything that happened tonight. I didn’t tell him about the things Marianne told me. Things not related to the business side of running a charity.
She cares for her friend, who both she and Derek treat like a brother. And she made it clear that Zach’s career means everything to him.
What am I doing? Do I want to start an affair with my professor? Is that why I let Lyndsey do my makeup and lay out my clothes? I can’t deny the effects were spectacular. Zach looked near ready to devour me on the spot.
But do I want to be devoured? Is this how I want to lose my virginity? To a man I will never be able to have? A man I can ruin with one misplaced look. A man who could ruin me and my future if anyone ever saw us together.
“You’re awfully quiet,” Zach says finally.
“I’m not the only one.”
“Hmm. Just thinking.”
“About what?” I pry. I shouldn’t, but I can’t help myself.
“I don’t want to bother you with the details.”
