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As it is, I just vaguely feel like I want to throw up and run away. Preferably both.
“I found her,” Juth says, even though it’s unnecessary. “She was fishing.”
“I wanted to get something for the hut,” I blurt out when all eyes turn to me. “To get rid of the curse.”
To my surprise, Tia brightens. “You think it’s a curse?”
“I don’t know what else it could be.”
“It is resonance,” I’rec growls, pinching the bridge of his nose. “That is all it is. Our khuis have decided.”
“Yes, but…but maybe it’s not a real resonance?” Tia straightens, tossing her hair back and looking hopeful for the first time since she landed. “Maybe the reason why it’s not sticking is because I’rec resonated to the wrong person.”
Steph’s brow furrows. “I’m not sure that’s how this works—”
“Is there something wrong with my voice?” I’rec straightens, his hands going to his hips. His tail lashes, and I can see frustration written clearly on his hard face. He glares at Tia, and then at Steph. Finally, his gaze goes to me, and it softens, just a little, and a quiver starts low in my belly again.
How sad am I that I’m getting turned on by a bit of eye-fucking from an alien confronting his long-distance girlfriend? That I’m encouraged by the fact that he’s ignoring the hot young thing crying at his feet (the hot young thing he’s lusted after for years, to boot) in exchange for the new toy (aka me). And that I’mexcitedby this.
God, this is so messed up.
“Listen to me,” I’rec says. “This resonance is not a mistake.” His gaze goes to Tia. “You can think what you like, but it is a real resonance. F’lor and I have mated. We resonate to one another. To say otherwise is insulting to both me and her.”
“But—” Tia begins.
“It is resonance,” I’rec says sharply. “It is done. F’lor is mine and I am hers and that is all to it. Resonance has decided.”
Tia slumps onto the pillows, hanging her head again. I want to tell her to have some pride, to straighten her backbone and tell I’rec she doesn’t need him, but I understand what it’s like to feel rejected. I’ve been there before in my relationships, and I don’t want to ever feel like that again. Maybe that’s why I’rec’s words don’t sit right with me. “No one’s asked me what I want.”
I’rec frowns. “Again, it is resonance—”
“Right. Which means we get together and make a baby. No one’s asked me what I wantafterthat.”
He narrows his eyes at me, his gaze locked on my face. “Very well. I am asking now.”
Everyone’s eyes are on me, and for a moment, I grow nervous. I need to say exactly what I want, even if it’s not going to make people happy. That’s tough for me—I like nothing more than to make people smile, to bring joy to their day, not to ruin it. But if I don’t speak up now, I might be dooming all of us to loveless relationships.
“I know this is hard,” I begin slowly, thinking. “For all three of us. Four, if you count R’jaal, and we probably should.” He’s not here, and I wonder if that was a mistake. I don’t want to speak for him, but he also wears his distress plain on his face. “Here’s the problem. Up until two days ago, I’rec was waiting for you, Tia. He loved you and wanted you to be his mate. I can’t imagine that shifting so rapidly simply because of resonance. But I also know what resonance is like. You can’t trust your mind. You can’t think clearly because all you can focus on is sex. Even right now…”
I shiver, because I’rec gives me a heated look and it affects me far more than it should.
Steph clears her throat. “I think this is a good point, Flor. It’s impossible to be logical and think clearly in the throes of resonance. Perhaps this conversation should be tabled until all the hormones settle and all parties can sit and come to an agreement, whatever that might be.” She gazes at each of us. “Can we all agree to that?”
Tia nods. “I’m not happy, but I understand.”
“Great,” I say. “Cool. We’ll get the whole ‘baby making’ thing under control and have this conversation again later, when we’re all thinking with our big heads. Now, if we’re done here, I really do need to catch a fish or two.” My Nanay would insist on me handling the spirit shit first. If the spirits ain’t happy, nobody is happy. And I’m not the most superstitious woman, but I’m also not taking any chances.
I duck back out of the hut, smiling at Juth and baby Jethani as I pass. I scoop up my fishing gear from where I left it outside the hut, and I barely make it three steps before my khui starts purring like crazy. I don’t even have to turn around to know that it’s I’rec. My body wouldn’t react like this for anyone else.
He storms to my side, all heavy feet and surly scowl, and I decide to ignore his bad mood. “You going fishing, too?”
“I need to talk to you,” I’rec says, keeping pace with my much smaller strides. “I am not happy with what just happened.”
“Because Tia’s upset? She can’t blame you for resonance. She might be upset right now, but once this is all done, you can make it up to her.” I keep my tone perky. “Cheer up. Soon you will have your cake and eat it, too.”
“Bah. I am not interested in cake.” He sounds grumpy.
“I am. I’m ready to have cake again, personally. Maybe we can get some of that fruit they were talking about and have someone make a cake.” My mouth waters at the thought. Every resonance has a party, right? I wouldn’t mind having two of them. “You think Hannah would open up the stores for us and—”
