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Alder puffed his chest proudly. “They wouldnae be able to chew through the scales.”
And here is yet another version of ye,Edwina mused, charmed by Felix’s sweetness and silliness with his nieces and nephews. It was, perhaps, the gentlest she had ever seen him. More than ever, she wished she could reverse time to the moment in the garden where Kenney had not-so-subtly asked her to leave. If she had just stayed there defiantly, or demanded that Felix take her to witness the brigands, she would not be standing in the doorway of the Morning Room, hurting at the bittersweet sight of her future husband playing with the children.
“The luncheon, Lady Edwina.” Ellen’s voice startled her out of her thoughts.
Ahead, the younger children jumped in fright, as Felix’s head whipped around: his gaze fixing upon Edwina. Shock washed across his handsome face, followed by the faintest grimace. No doubt, he had just realized what she had witnessed.
“The bear ate, now we eat!” Miriam shouted excitedly, hurtling toward Ellen and the food. The other children quickly followed her lead, swarming Ellen until the tray had been picked clean, and the children had retreated to devour their spoils.
As Edwina stood rooted to the spot, Felix gazed at her with such intensity that she began to tremble. He had looked at her that way once before; she could still feel the roughness of his palm on her thigh and the press of his lips against hers. Yet, in that moment, his eyes held more than desire and longing. They were pained, as if staring at her physically hurt him—the look of a man who wanted to strip himself bare in every way and show her everything that he could not say.
All of a sudden, he was walking toward her. She braced herself, fully expecting him to make his excuses and stride right past her. Instead, he took hold of her hand and pulled her out into the hallway. She let herself be tugged along, more out of surprise than anything else, until he stopped sharply and pushed her against the wall. There, with his hands on the wall to either side of her head, he gazed down at her, panting a little.
“Would ye also care for some luncheon?” she asked nervously, uncertain of his intentions.
He shook his head. “I’m nae hungry for food, Lass.”
“Pardon?” She could guess his meaning, but she did not dare. Or, perhaps, she wanted him to confess it.
He trailed his hands down the stone wall until they touched her shoulders, where he brought his caress across to her neck, until his hands cradled her face. She swallowed, forcing herself to look into his eyes. A dangerous risk, making her grateful that the children were there. That would halt any untoward notions that he might have.
“I cannae stand this,” he rasped, his teeth grazing his lower lip. “I cannae stand that ye think ill of me, when I havenae done anythin’ amiss. I wouldnae. Nae to ye. Do ye think I would’ve promised the rest of my life to ye if I was goin’ to ruin it all, a few nights before our weddin’?”
Edwina gulped. “I… daenae ken ye, Felix. I daenae ken what ye would or wouldnae do.”
“I walked through the gardens this mornin’, hopin’ to catch a glimpse of ye, and then John tells me ye’re nae even in the Castle.” Felix’s nose crinkled as if he was wincing in pain. “Ye were cross with me for runnin’ away when we kissed in the tower, butyeran away this time. Ye dinnae even let me explain myself to ye.”
Edwina dropped her gaze, too overcome by the intensity in his. “I heard everythin’ ye said in the courtyard.”
“Then why did ye leave? Why did ye nae stay, where I could find ye and tell ye that… I wouldnae do that to ye?” Felix dipped his head, pressing his brow to hers. “I’m nae in the habit of torturin’ myself, Edwina, and betrayin’ ye before our weddin’ would be the worst kind of torment.”
She could hear the sincerity and agony in his voice, urging her to believe him. She desperately wanted to, but who vanished for two days without good reason?
“Then, whatdidhappen?” she asked outright. “If all ye did was drink, how could ye have lost two days of yer life? It doesnae make sense. Ye must see that, nay?”
He tilted her chin up. “Aye, I see that, and I wish I had an explanation, but I daenae. All I ken is that I wouldnae hurt ye, and I wouldnae be disloyal to ye.”
He kissed her before she could resist, his mouth desperate and fierce upon hers. And though she was confused and hurt and desperate in her own way, she could not help but kiss him back. It felt as natural as breathing to her, and the absence of him over the last couple of days had been akin to suffocation. The worry had put a great weight on her lungs, and his kiss and reassurance were the only thing that could make her draw air again. Even if the weight came back when they broke away, at least she could breathe for a second or two, and pretend that all was well.
“Believe me,” he whispered against her mouth. “Please, believe me.”
“I want to,” she whispered back, already losing herself in his kiss. It was a dangerous thing, capable of making her forgive and forget just about anything.
“Then do, because I think—”
Just then, his hands fell away from her face, and he stepped back, severing their kiss. She stared at him in hurt confusion, only to realize that they were not alone. Two figures were bustling down the hallway, oblivious to their presence.
Meredith and Melissa had returned from the seamstress at the worst possible moment, and they did not seem too pleased to see their brother.
“Who let ye in, eh?” Melissa rushed toward him, grabbing his arm.
Meredith skirted behind him, pushing at his back. “Ye shouldnae be here, Felix. I told ye nae to come. When Edwina is ready to see ye, she’ll see ye. Right now, she has to see if her dress fits.”
“Aye, so ye’d better return to yer Castle and pray she’ll even be there at yer weddin’,” Melissa muttered, wrangling him further down the hallway, toward the front door.
He looked back over his shoulder, casting Edwina one last, lingering look before he disappeared out of the doorway. Heat rushed through her like a fever, stoked by that longing in his eyes, the tingling touch of his lips upon hers, and the mystery of what he would have said if his sisters had not interrupted.
Because ye think what? What is it ye think? Do ye think… ye feel somethin’ for me? Do ye think ye remember what happened?It would annoy her all day, trying to figure it out, but she could not leave Melissa and Meredith at such an important moment.
