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There’s an uncomfortable pause.
Carly downs the last of her orange juice and races to the bathroom to shower. When she’s finished washing and dressing, she returns to the bedroom to find me sitting on the bed, watching the highlights from a football game on TV.
“Are you ready to go, darling?” I ask.
“Yes, I think so,” she replies flatly. Her face looks so sad I want to throw my arms around her and hug her.
Smiling sweetly, I pick up the remote and switch off the TV. Shrugging on my coat, I take one last look around the room. “Have we definitely got everything?”
She pats down her pockets. “I think so.”
“Ah ha!” I snatch her Kermit watch from the dresser and dangle it before her. “We almost forgot this little treasure.”
Carly laughs but I can tell it isn’t genuine.
Smiling again, I walk over and put the watch back on her wrist. As I finish strapping it up, our eyes meet and I sense that she requires some sort of explanation. She wants to know if she’ll ever see me again after today, but right now, I don’t have the answers. I need more time to think about where to go from here.
Linking my arm through hers, I finish locking up, then I lead her out into the corridor. We take the elevator down to the lobby and drop off our keys at reception. As promised, I mention the broken wardrobe to the concierge and a phone call is made. Minutes later, my old friend Luigi appears and takes me to one side for a chat. In no time at all, an agreement is struck.
“So, I’ll post you the cheque on Monday?” I grin.
“Yes, sir,” Luigi replies. “Whatever’s most convenient for you.”
We shake hands—a gentleman’s agreement. Then I take Carly’s arm and lead her out of the building.
A harsh breeze is blowing and she turns up her collar to fend off the morning chill. Instinctively, I reach in my pocket and roll out the scarf she made for me. Releasing her arm, I tie the scarf around my neck and look around us to get my bearings. “Right, where do I need to take you? The nearest station is Charing Cross. Five minutes in that direction.”
“Charing Cross will be fine,” she shrugs.
We start walking and in no time at all, we’re standing at the entrance to the Underground.
“So, you’ll be all right getting home?” I ask earnestly.
Carly nods and forces a grin. “Of course.” The silence seems to last forever.
“Aren’t you getting the Tube, too? I thought you said you were going to Shepherd’s Bush?”
“That’s right,” I reply, “but I might have a browse of the shops first. I’ve still got some time to kill before the meeting.”
That’s a lie. And a not very good one. I wonder if she can tell?
She tucks a hair behind her ear and shifts her weight awkwardly. Inside, I’m dying. I hate behaving like such a bastard.
Lovingly, I wrap my arm around her waist and draw her close. Softly, I kiss her cheek. Fuck, she smells delectable. “Safe journey, darling. I’ll call you when I get out of the meeting.”
Her face perks up. “Do you promise?”
“I promise.”
“Thanks for a wonderful night. It was simply…awesome.”
For a second, I’m too choked to speak. Wordlessly, I give her a final squeeze, wave goodbye and leave her at the Underground. I dare not look back.
If I do, I know I’ll have a breakdown.
When I get back to Pimlico, I collapse on the couch, laughing hysterically. I’m both happy and sad; feel like dancing, feel like crying all at once. My head is so mixed up, I don’t know what to do with myself.
I feel like this could be the start of something special, yet at the same time, I’m riddled with severe misgivings about what the future holds for us should I decide to pursue this relationship. I have no doubt that Carly is my soul mate. She totally completes me—the yin to my yang. The joy I feel when I’m with her is indescribable, and I crave our next meeting like a junkie craves heroin. But is it wise for me to feel this way, knowing what terrible dangers may lurk on the horizon? My head is telling me one thing, my heart something else, and I’m completely torn over what to do.
