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OCTAVIA
It’s been two weeks since that stupid Knight party and Lincoln has barely looked at me, let alone spoken to me. Finn and Mav haven’t talked to him either, and East said he’s about as much fun to live with as a bear with a thorn in its paw.
But no one can get any answers from him about what the actual fuck is going on with him because he won’t speak to anyone.
Frustrated and devastated doesn’t even begin to cover how I feel.
But more than anything, I’m just sad and angry.
What’s worse? I haven’t heard from Harrison either, so I still have this bullshit with the Knights hanging over my head. I don’t want to think that it’s all wrapped up in the Lincoln stuff, but at this point, I have no idea what to think anymore.
I roll over in bed, grabbing my phone from the nightstand.
Eleven at night on a Friday and here I am, living the rockstar life of pining over a boy.
I pull up my private thread with him. His last message stares at me from weeks ago…
Tears prick my eyes. Nope, doesn’t hurt at all.
Me:
Are you ever going to explain?
My thumb hovers over send for a few seconds before I hit it and stare at the screen like a crazy person. I know I should be content. I have the other three, and it’s not like I love them less, or I love him more… I just don’t understand.
The message shows as delivered.
Then read.
And then nothing.
I bury my face in the pillow and let out a scream so as not to alert Smithy. The one weekend he doesn’t stay at Matthew’s and I have a minor breakdown. Though it could be the sheer volume of tears, ice cream, and murder shows I’ve worked through the last two weeks that made him stay home this weekend.
It’s the first night I’ve been alone since that night. Between Indi and the guys, someone has been here, but I told everyone I was okay. That I wanted a night alone.
I really don’t want to be that girl.
But here I am, staring at my phone like a crazy person.
Three dots appear on the screen, and I hate myself for the way my heart skips a beat.
I practically hold my breath waiting for the message, but they just disappear.
Of course they fucking do. I pull up an audiobook, hoping that the sound of voices will lull me to sleep, but then my phone buzzes and I drop it, slapping myself in the face.
Might just be the highlight of my night.
Fuck my life.
I pick up my phone and see his name on the screen.
Lincoln:
You seem to have already decided you know everything. What’s left to explain?
Fuck my life. Why is he such a pain in the ass?
Me:
