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We chose not to find out the sex. Mostly, because of the dream I had back when we’d first become official; the night I took all those pregnancy tests. We were scared to be disappointed if the first one was a girl, so to make the experience different, we wanted to be surprised. Gabby’s example preceded me. She did it just fine, not missing out on anything, so I did it too.
I place my hand on the back of his tiny head, brushing my fingers over his silky brown hair. I’m smitten with such a tiny person. There isn’t another experience like becoming a parent for the first time. “I love him too,” I say, still emotional from it all.
Landon grabs my chin and pulls me in, kissing me this time. When my tongue delves into his mouth, he groans, already pulling back. “It’s going to be a long six weeks.”
Yeah, no. There are other things that make you feel good aside from intercourse. My hand runs up the inside of Landon’s bare thigh, hitting his boxer briefs, and I continue upward until my hand meets his dick, already semi-erect under the fabric. “We can play in other ways.”
A subtle whine sounds between us, making me drop everything I was doing to lean in and kiss his temple. Levi is curled up on Landon’s chest, his legs pulled in underneath him, and his arms spread out. As soon as he was born, I knew immediately he was going to have Landon’s middle name. I can tell already he has his mouth and chin.
Levi Noah Scott is what we chose. It’s perfect, just like him.
When his face starts rooting around on Landon’s chest and his head is bobbing, I feel bad. Okay, maybe breastfeeding isn’t as bad as I made it seem. It’s something only I can do.
“I guess he’s hungry,” Landon says, making me realize how much I love my life. I graduated college but I haven’t been to work yet, since I was already pregnant. It was pointless to do that to an employer when I’d have to turn around and take maternity leave. We both decided that I’ll go when I’m ready. It’s hard to beat being able to tour with my husband. We like the time together on the road more than an extra paycheck when we aren’t hurting for money. We’ve been living together since I graduated high school and was sleeping in the same bed more times than not even before that.
I’m not sure if or when I’ll change that, but my last plan was to work for a company to get experience in the music industry and then my dad mentioned investing for me to start my own business. If I do choose a life-long career, I’ll likely take him up on the offer, if nothing more than for the simple fact of being able to set my own schedule. I want to be all in as a mother and wife, and if a job takes away from that, then I’ll find a different option.
I stand upright and open my cardigan. “Perfect timing. My milk came in.”
Landon’s eyes veer to my chest, taking in the wet circles, a proud smile radiating when our eyes meet again. “Yeah? So I’m safe from having to run out for formula?” he jokes.
I place my hands underneath Levi’s arms, my thumbs stabilizing his neck when I lift him off Landon’s chest until I can get him turned around, a dramatic and completely fake eye roll following. He knew all that bitching I was doing about raw and bleeding nipples from him nursing almost nonstop since his birth served no purpose. My threats to stop with all the pain were empty. I don’t have to show all my cards, though.
As soon as Levi is turned around, his little mouth starts moving across my chest, looking for food. I touch my cheek down on his soft head, still looking at Landon as I bounce him all the way to the couch next to the recliner. I smile. “For now.”
Murphy jumps on the couch to lay beside me before I do. When I get seated and lay our son across my lap in my arm, I pull one side of my tank top up, and then position him until he can latch on. He does it as soon as I touch my nipple to his bottom lip, just like the lactation specialist in the hospital showed me, and then he starts to suckle. Slowly, I feel relieved, but I’ll still likely have to pump.
Instead of Landon getting up like I thought he would, he turns on the TV and leans back in his chair, most likely looking for a ballgame. I look over at him. “You aren’t going back to sleep?”
“No. You’re awake.”
“I never pictured this when you were giving me a lengthy speech mid-thrust about how no girl would ever trap you with a kid or have access to your money. I feel like I was lied to.”
He doesn’t look at me as he flips through the channels, but after a few seconds of no response, his mouth curves. “I meant it. Then I lost you. Twice.”
I fight against the smile and lose. “Missed me, huh?”
I know the answer. I still like to hear his answer. Ever since he showed up in California when I got grounded from taking a flight with him to Mississippi, if there is any moment we can spend together, he’s never chosen anything else. Sneaking behind my parents’ back to go to his house was the best decision I ever made. I have no regrets. After that we were a real couple. And despite what he said in the beginning, we’re best friends on top of being lovers, partners, and now parents. We like to be together.
His eyes are still on the football game that’s on. “Chased you all the way to California and never let go, didn’t I?”
“Yes, you did.” I look down at our son and switch him to the other breast like I was taught to do. After several seconds of me rubbing his smooth skin and staring at him in awe, I feel eyes on me. “What?” I ask when I catch Landon staring.
“I’m glad you took me back all those times I was being a tool,” he confesses for the first time in all these years, and we reminisce quite often.
My chest swells, my emotions all over the place from my hormones being out of whack. That’s a better ‘I love you’ than if he’d said it, but I return with, “I knew you’d give me cute babies.”
He laughs just before his eyes go back to the game. “You’re full of shit.”
I glance down at his left hand on the remote, my eyes locking on the wedding band he hasn’t taken off since I put it there. My content smile explains everything I feel inside. “Maybe I am, and maybe I just loved you then.”
He looks my way. “I love you, and my son.”
This is what it looks like to have the best life there is. One thing we’ve always done right—balance loving and fighting, playing games and being serious. Every day is a fun adventure with him. We never get bored. “You did give me a cute baby, though.”
He smirks. “Have you seen his mother?”
“She as hot as his dad?”
“Definitely. Fifty-fifty split the credit?”
I hold out my right hand off the arm of the couch, fingers spread. “Deal.”
Without missing a beat, he laces the fingers of his left hand in mine, and everything becomes comfortable as the game plays in the background. This is us. Started on a bet. Ended in love.
