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Lauren laughed. Danny glowered.
She gave Joey a hug. “You were just a little pain-in-my-ass the last time I saw you.”
“Ah, now I’m probably just a big pain-in-the-ass. And this slack-jawed fool here is my friend Vinny.”
Vinny took off his hat, eyes round. “Vinny. Ah, Vincent. Vincent Novak. Sure is a pleasure to meet you, ma’am.” Based on the drawl, Vin wasn’t from New York. He turned scarlet as he talked. Lauren found it charming.
“I’m no ma’am, got that?”
“Of course. Yes, ma… Aww, shoot.” Vinny turned even redder and rubbed his hand over his cropped hair.
While the brothers conspired about the best way to surprise their mother, Lauren chatted with Vinny and took a couple photos with him. He thanked her several times and only needed to be reminded once not to call her “ma’am.” Some passersby noticed the commotion and stopped to admire her. It took another fifteen minutes to disentangle herself from the new knot of fans vying for an autograph or a picture, but once she did, she found Danny off to the side, his face pinched and frowning.
“You never get a moment to yourself, do you?” There was a shadow of discontent in his voice.
“Life I signed up for.” Not wanting to reignite the argument about her very public private life, Lauren changed the subject. “Your mom’s going to be thrilled to have Joey home.”
“You’re not kidding! I still can’t believe my kid brother has been in the Army for six years.”
They talked about Joey for a few minutes and then walked in silence, simply enjoying each other’s closeness and watching other people who were in the park pass them by. No one else gave them a second look, and Lauren enjoyed the slow relaxed pace and the warm summer sunshine. Today’s session in the studio had felt frantic and intense, and she relished the chance to slow down. Danny’s hand brushed hers, and their fingers entwined loosely. She loved how it felt, but she pulled her hand away.
“What’s wrong?” he asked, and she could hear the umbrage in his voice.
“I loved that,” she said. “More than I should. But we can’t walk around holding hands. What if Joey had seen us like that?”
Danny’s sigh was dejected. “You’re right.”
Silent, they walked along the wide path that circled around and brought them back to the carousel. Lauren leaned on the rail and looked through the arched openings in the brick. Inside, the brightly painted horses galloped in a circle while children held the shiny brass poles and laughed. Danny leaned on the rail next to her, close enough for their arms to touch. But before long, he glanced at his watch.
“Go,” she said. “You don’t want to miss Lucas’s game. He’ll be looking for you.”
“See you again soon?”
She nodded. Despite their discussion before, Danny gave her another kiss that left her nearly breathless, and she felt another brick in the wall she’d built between them crumble to dust. Lauren watched until the crowd swallowed him.
She put her fingers to her lips, imagining she could still feel his kiss. It was so easy to be distracted. Thinking of kissing Danny was a short distance to remembering the many times they’d been together. And from there, it didn’t take much to imagine what it would be like to be with him now. The thrill of her daydream was quickly followed by shame as thoughts of Danny’s sons, and his wife, pushed their way into her mind. She had no business thinking about him like that but couldn’t stop herself.
What the hell are we even thinking?
After watching the carousel for a few more minutes, she meandered along until she reached a playground area reserved for small children. Stevie was lying on his back in the grass with his legs straight in the air. His daughter was shrieking with laughter as she balanced on top of his feet. Gabby waved Lauren over, and they both watched Stevie play and laugh with Maya.
“That’s an odd look,” Gabby said. “Don’t tell me you’ve finally got a biological clock kicking in?”
“Bio-what? Oh, hell, no. I can barely take care of myself. I like being an auntie to my sisters’ kids,” Lauren said, a snort of laughter tinting her voice.
Over on the lawn, Stevie had moved on to spinning Maya around him like she was an airplane. Gabby called over a warning to not make their daughter too dizzy or he’d be the one cleaning up puke.
Have I ever wanted kids?Lauren wondered.I guess I did a long time ago.She didn’t know if that was because she actually wanted children or because it was what she was supposed to want. That had been everyone’s plan: grow up, get married, have babies, retire to Boca. That didn’t sound like a plan to Lauren—it sounded like her version of hell.
But as she watched Stevie, who had finally put his daughter down and was watching her chase bubbles, Lauren found herself thinking about Danny again. He was the exception to every rule she’d ever had. But things wouldn’t be different this time around. She was on a road to another broken heart if she didn’t do anything about it. Problem was, she really didn’t want to stop.
ChapterTwenty-Three
The Red Parrot Café was a favorite of Lauren’s. She’d found it within two days of moving back to New York. A short walk from her place, it was open almost 24/7 and not only served top-notch coffee, but they made iced cinnamon rolls that were to die for. It was late enough in the evening that she relegated herself to decaf only. What she really wanted to do was drown her sorrows in some top shelf tequila but showing up hung over at the studio in the morning wasn’t an option.
The more she pushed herself to come up with that hook, the brilliant idea that would turn into the single the band needed, the more mired she became. She was wading through a bog of creative quicksand that pulled her further under with every rejected idea. Pressing the heel of her palm against her forehead, she fought the urge to fling the coffee against the wall.
She hated admitting anything that made her look weak or incapable, and she hadn’t told anyone—not even Augie—how much she was really struggling. She’d watched too many other artists circle the drain, cranking out mediocre music in a desperate attempt to keep their careers alive. The thought of that happening to her and The Kingmakers made her stomach heave.
