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I hear a cheer from outside the ring, but my focus is all on Jax.
“What the fuck, Lilly!” Jax practically roars at me, not fighting my hold, and I can see the panic in his eyes, the worry that he really could have hurt me.
“What the fuck?” I ask, my voice raspy and my throat a bit sore from his hand. I’m still seething. “I’ll tell you what the fuck! Why the fuck are you filling your body with fucking poison, Jax? Do you know how bad regular steroid abuse is for you?!” I hit his hands on the ground in my rage. I know it’s not his fault, not really, but I’m so mad, and his cuntflap of a father isn’t here to feel the sharpness of my rage.
His gaze softens more. “Baby…” he begins, but I interrupt him before he can say another word.
“Don’t you ‘Baby’ me! Taking pills at parties is one thing, Jax. Taking this shit day in, day out...it’ll fuck you up so bad that you might not recover.” The thought of possibly losing him to this, makes my heart race, and panic fills my chest. “From this moment on you won’t take them, do you hear me?” I lean down so that I can whisper in his ear. “Otherwise you can kiss this goodbye.” I roll my hips which just so happen to be right over his crotch. I feel him starting to harden at the movement. “Did you know that steroids can shrink your dick, and I like it the monster size that it is,” I say, rolling my hips again, forgetting our audience and making him groan out loud. I hear a chuckle that sounds like Enzo.
Licking the shell of his ear, I bite down on his lobe, hearing another delicious moan escape his lips. I let go of his wrists, get up, and stand over him, looking down.
“No pussy until that shit is out of your system,” I tell him, deadly serious. His blue eyes widen.
“Baby Girl…” he starts as I turn to walk away. I look back at him.
“Lucky for you, your arms are the size of tree trunks. I’m sure they’ll manage the extra exercise that your hand will get,” I say, my tone laced with fake sweetness.
Then, turning on my heel, I head to the edge of the ring, where Loki is holding the rope open for me.
“That was vicious, Pretty Girl,” he tells me, an evil smile on his face. “And so fucking hot,” he adds as he helps me down.
Kai is right there, tilting my head and looking at my neck. He brushes his long fingers across my throat, and I wince before he puts an ice pack against it, the cold like a soothing balm.
I look up and see Enzo standing behind him. He just grins, giving me a nod, respect and what looks like relief in his eyes. I hear Jax step down, and suddenly Kai is gone, and I turn around in time to see him punch Jax square in the jaw, making his head snap to the side.
“Be more fucking careful,” Kai hisses, before coming back to me. I’m standing there in shock, mouth open.
Kai just fucking punched Jax! And Jax took it!
“Come on, Lilly,” Kai says, wrapping an arm around me and leading me towards the office and my clothes. “Let’s get you back, and I’ll make chicken ramen for lunch.”
We go to pass Enzo, who stops me with a hand on my arm, then pulls me into a tight embrace.
“You were made for them,cara mia, lo credo veramente,” he whispers, before kissing both cheeks, giving me a slightly quizzical, considering type of look, then letting me go.
Chapter Thirty-Six
LILLY
It's a silent journey back to the dorms, all of us lost in our own minds. I can't stop thinking about Jax and his drug abuse.
Did the guys know? Why did they not stop it? And did he start taking them in the first place because his father made him? Or is there another reason?
I look over at Jax, once again in the driver’s seat. His brow is deeply furrowed, and I can see him practically vibrating, his shoulders tense and his nostrils flared. I wonder if I could have reacted a little better back at the gym, and a stab of guilt runs through me. I was so angry, so blinded by my rage, that I didn't stop to think about the fact that I was taking out my fury on Jax.
Pulling up into the student lot, we all get out and hurriedly head back towards the academy. The temperature has dropped now it’s November, and we've already had a couple of small flurries of snow.
Arriving in our dorm, I quickly shower, then help Kai prepare a delicious ramen for lunch, whilst Loki then Jax wash up. I love cooking with him, he makes it so fun, and his passion is intoxicating. Not to mention the small teasing touches that leave me panting and breathless. As we sit down to eat, the atmosphere is still a little tense, and I know that I am partly, maybe mostly, to blame. Biting my lip, a thought springs to mind.
“Why don't we watch a film together after lunch?” I suggest, thinking that what we all need is to curl up on the sofas in front of a funny movie.
After much debate, we decide on Deadpool. I wait for Jax to sit down on one of the sofas, Loki next to him, and then curl up on his lap, eliciting a grunt of surprise from his lips. I look up into his slightly startled blue eyes and try not to get lost in their depths. There’s a fear in them, a fear that I’m pretty sure I caused, and that I’m desperate to erase.
“I love you, Jax Griffiths,” I say softly, willing him to believe me. “And I will help you to get through this. You’ve got me now, and I’m not going anywhere.”
His hands tighten on my waist before he wraps his massive arms around me, pulling me even closer to him. I love his fresh warm lemon scent, I don’t think that I’ll ever get enough of it.
These guys are definitely turning me sappy.
