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Jayden leaned against Darius’s side and gazed into the fire, and Gray immediately knew where the boy’s mind went. As it sometimes did. As they sometimes made sure it did.
Jonas would never be forgotten either.
Darius hugged Jayden to him and kissed the top of his head. “We had a lotta help along the way, didn’t we?”
Jayden nodded. “My big brother helped.”
Gray blinked past the sudden sting in his eyes and busied himself with helping Cass drink from her sippy cup. But his thoughts wouldn’t stray from Jonas. If only they could see each other for five minutes, so that Gray could tell him how Jayden was doing.
He’s thriving, buddy.
He’s just like you.
We miss you.
They had no graves to visit, so they’d found a big rock back home, along the cliffside behind the cabin, where they’d attached little plaques with all the names of the guys they’d lost.
“It’s important we never forget those who helped us get to where we are today,” Darius was saying quietly, and Gray did his best to pay attention again. “Sometimes, the smallest thing makes the biggest difference. Someone who gives us strength to fight another day, someone who says something that brightens our mood. It can be anything. Life is full of those moments. Full of memories.”
Milo had once given Gray the strength to fight harder.
When he’d started giving up on himself, Gray had looked to Milo and seen someone worth rescuing.
When Linus had died, Gray had reconnected with his rage.
Rage was a good tool.
The guys they’d lost were still there for Gray in a way. It was why he—and Darius—couldn’t close the door completely for the next mission. Their children would keep them from taking too many risks, but they’d found their compromise. Chances were, they’d head out again sometime in the future. Because there would always be a Milo who needed saving. Or a Gray or a Jonas or a Cole or a Niko.
Gray caught Justin nod to himself, before the boy said, “I just checked, and I remember lots of things.”
Gray exhaled a chuckle and reached over to ruffle his boy’s hair.
Justin smiled goofily and stuck the last piece of his hot dog into his mouth. “Can we hear the thermos story now, Daddy?” He turned to Darius.
Yes, please.
It was a much lighter story.
“Sure thing.” Darius gestured for the thermos in question, positioned next to the cooler, so Gray handed it over to Jayden, who could pass it on. “This thermos right here is older than all of you—including Gray.”
Gray grinned and shook his head.
“Is it older than you?” Jayden smirked, asking the same question he had last time they’d heard the story.
So Gray provided the same joke as then too. “Nothing is older than Darius.”
“You’re comedians, both of you,” Darius drawled. “It actually is older than me.”
“Because it used to be Grandpa’s!” Justin exclaimed.
“Exactly.” Darius tapped his nose. Then he bit into his hot dog and spoke with his mouth full. “He bought it at the thrift store when Grandma was pregnant with my big brother, Jake.”
The first time he’d turned this into a story for the kids, this part had been followed with, “It’s proof you don’t gotta shell out a fortune on modern shit like that Yeti brand. This cost my pop one buck and has kept coffee warm for nearly five decades.”
First of all, Yeti was the best thing since sliced bread. Second of all, one dollar fifty years ago was approximately eleven bucks today, almost the same price as a Yeti cup. So yeah. Gray would just keep ordering all things Yeti. Outdoor blankets, mugs, thermoses, coolers—the whole nine yards. And he did not show Darius the price tag each time.
“You see here…?” Darius held the black thermos closer to the fire, revealing names carved into the finish. “Grandpa made it a tradition of his to bring the thermos to the hospital every time Grandma went into labor—which, let’s face it, was a lot.”
Jayden snickered.
“Your name is the second, Daddy,” Justin said. “Right?”
“Yeah, right here. And all your uncles on my side of the family.” Darius pointed to the carvings. “First Jake, then me, Ryan, Ethan, Lias, and your aunties, Willow and Elise.”
James had added Willow and Elise to the list when their adoptions had gone through, which made this Justin’s favorite story.
“Then one day,” Darius went on, “just last year, when you two became official Quinns, I helped Grandpa clean out his garage. And I found this thermos.”
Justin giggled in anticipation. “Grandma wanted to throw it away.”
“Can you believe that?” Darius got animated about it. “She wanted to throw out a perfectly good thermos.”
Gray chuckled and welcomed a climbing Cass onto his lap. She was done eating, and one yawn set off another. Sweet pea. He pressed kisses into her hair and wrapped the sleeping bag over her like a duvet.
