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"Uh-huh," I said. "Well, just don't watch me when I sleep, okay?"
"I don't think I'd do that,” he said, shaking his head, but there was a weird silence between us as we gazed at each other. His eyes were on my lips, and my eyes were on his face. "Why would I want to watch you sleep?” he asked, finally. "Anyway, I'll be back. Let me go and get the stuff."
I watched as he walked away, and I could hear my heart beating in my ears. I wondered if it was so loud that everyone in the restaurant could hear me. I looked around. I hadn't even paid attention to anyone since we'd gotten here. Which was unusual for me because I love to people watch. My phone beeped, and I saw that Alice had texted me. I pulled my phone out and stared at her message.
"Hey, what's going on? Call me ASAP. I want to know all the tea."
I started laughing as I shook my head. I quickly fired back."Just having tacos with Oliver. I'll call you as soon as I can. Miss you."I could see that she was typing back a response. But Oliver was headed back toward the table, so I put my phone back in my handbag.
"Who was that?” he asked, nodding toward my handbag.
"Just Alice."
"Ah, she's checking up on you. I bet she must miss you."
"I miss her too."
"This is the longest you guys have gone without seeing each other?"
"No. When she went to Europe for two weeks, we didn't see each other then."
"Oh, two whole weeks. What are you going to do without each other?"
"I don't know." I sighed. “It’s going to be hard. She’s like my sister. And well, I really wanted to start this adventure and journey with her.”
“I know,” he said. “When I moved to New York with Foster, I wasn’t sure...”
“Sorry, what?” I asked him curiously. Was he about to admit that he wasn’t the strong man he portrayed?
“I mean, when I moved to New York with your brother, Foster. I was really happy to have someone to explore the city with. And he made new friends, and I made new friends, and some of them came together. It's a really cool bonding experience to have your best friend in the same town as you."
"I know, so I really hope Alice can come soon. That's why I have to get a job as soon as possible."
"So you don't just want to freeload on our couch?"
"No, I don't, Oliver. And that's not even funny."
"I'm just teasing you, Rosalie, you know that. So what are your real options? And please don't say that you're going to be a tap dancer or a ballet dancer because we both know..."
"I know," I cut him off. "I can't dance. I can't sing. I was thinking maybe I'd try to get a job as a librarian or at a coffee shop. I don't know."
"Hmm," he said. "Well, we should really think about this."
"What do you meanweshould think about this?"
"I'd like to help you figure out what you want to do. Remember when we were younger, I always used to try to help you troubleshoot and fix your problems.”
"Oliver, that was problems like, should I have two cookies or one? Or should I play soccer or basketball? Or should I wear a black blouse or a white blouse? It wasn't, what am I going to do with the rest of my life?" I stared at him, and all of a sudden, I realized that I had absolutely no clue where I was going in life. My lower lip trembled, and I stared up at him. "I just can't believe that I'm twenty-two years old, and I have absolutely no clue what's next."
"Don't look at it like that,” he said, reaching over and squeezing my hand. He paused for a couple of seconds as I pulled my hand away from him. His warm skin against mine had almost electrocuted me. I couldn't just sit there, letting him touch me, feeling the way that I did. "Look at it," he continued, "as an opportunity to figure out what you really love, what you really want to do. And then go for your passion. This is probably the only time you'll have this opportunity in your life."
"You think?" I said.
"I mean, I don't know." He shrugged. "But this is a great time to figure that out because it's really hard once you have a job and you're making money to leave it, to figure out the unknown."
I stared at him for a few seconds, wondering if he was talking about himself. "Do you not like being an attorney?"
"It's fine," he said. "Is it what I dreamed about doing when I was younger? No. Does it fulfill me a hundred percent? No. Does it pay me shit tons of money? Yeah. But you, Rosalie, you're special. You need to figure out what you want to do that will make you happy. And not think about the money, and not think about anything else. And I want to help you find that."
