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I stew the whole way home. No matter how much I try not to think about anything, I think abouteverything.The closer we get to home, the angrier I am. Julian drops Stacey off at the estate entrance, Katina meeting him at the door.
“Katina, please take Stacey to her room for the evening. Marina will be staying with me.”
Katina’s eyebrow lifts, but she doesn’t say a word as she ushers Stacey away. Stacey waves her goodbye, knowing I’m in no mood to talk. She didn’t do anything wrong. I’m not angry with her. No. This is between Julian and me. There are some boundaries not to be crossed and lying is one of them.
If he can’t help hearing my thoughts, fine. I don’t like it, but it can’t be helped. It’s keeping it a secret and taking advantage that I’m not all right with. If he’s holding things back from me now, how are we supposed to move forward? There are so many obstacles in our way already that withholding information makes it impossible to have a relationship.
Julian told me on the way home that I would be staying with him tonight. It’s not what I want, but we can’t exactly have the talk that I want to have in the main house. He’s said many times—as has Katina—that there are eyes and ears everywhere in that place, and I plan on being loud with my frustration.
Julian parks the car and starts up the Gator—a motorized vehicle much like a golf cart, only bigger—which is what he uses to get back to his home. We drive in silence until we are parked and I’m jumping off.
“Marina, please,” Julian says to my back, but I march into the house, slamming the door open. His strong hand reaches out, grabbing my elbow and twisting me around, my chest hitting his.
“Stop. Listen to me.”
I yank his hands off me and push him away. “No. You listen to me,” I command. “I am sick and tired of being kept in the dark. I’m always five steps behind you, and that makes this relationship uneven. I’m not going to do it anymore, Julian. You’re either going to tell me everything I need to know, or this ends here, and I don’t care if the Council has marked me. I’ll leave.”
Looking dejected, Julian asks, “What do you want to know? I told you everything at the diner.”
“How many people have you slept with?”
He throws his head back. “That’s such a human thing to ask, Marina. There’s no way you’re going to like the answer. I can’t win here. I have been around for centuries and there have been years in that time when all I could do was drown in someone else. It wasn’t love. I can’t be held accountable for that.”
It’s an unfair question, one I didn’t think through. But now that I’ve asked, I’m following it through. “Just answer the question, Julian.”
“I don’t know,” he says, throwing his hands up. “I have not even the slightest idea.”
I’m being childish right now, so I put that one aside, because really, at the end of the day, I don’t want to know, and it’s not really what I’m upset about. “Have you ever been in love?”
“Once. I’ve been in love once,” he admits, and my stomach nosedives, vomit creeping up my throat.
“Who is she?” I whisper, unsure that this is a great idea. It won’t change anything, and most likely, it will only hurt my ego more.
He closes his eyes. “You really don’t want to know the answer to that question.”
I know without a shadow of a doubt it was Adèle. He nods his head, clearly reading it in my mind. It was obvious in the way he looked at her.
“I love Adèle, but not in that way, Marina. I love her like family.”
If I could see my face, I imagine it would be green. The fact that he loves her in any way is more than I can bear.
“We attempted to have a relationship more than a hundred years ago, and it didn’t work. She needs her freedom, and honestly, I was all right with that.”
“You’re engaged to her. Am I to believe that your devotion to your family won’t end in a broken heart for me?”
“A month ago, I might’ve tried to convince her to settle down, but then you walked into my life, and everything changed. I don’t know why, and I don’t know how, but you changed everything. I love you, Marina. Only you. Always.”
Tingles. They start at my fingertips, then work their way up my arms, over my shoulders, and down my back.He loves me. He said it.
He pulls me into him again. “I will say it to you a thousand times if that’s what you need, because I love you.” He places a small kiss on my cheek. “I love your smart mouth, and the way you try so hard to be brave when you are scared to death. I love the way you stood tall even when your knees were shaking at the auction. I love the way you care about a girl that you’ve only just met. The way you would go toe to toe with a vampire to keep her safe. It’s the stuff of vampire legends. I would do anything to keep you safe. I would lay down my crown. I swear it to you.”
The stuff of vampire legends.
“You want to know my secrets, Marina? You want to know everything my father died to protect?”
I don’t say a word, allowing him the chance to tell me every detail. To fill in the missing pieces. He knows that’s all I want; there is no point in saying it.
“My father knew of the familiar legend of Borns. He hunted down hedge witches for information, foretelling, but he always came up short. Until Madame Shante. She told him three sisters would be born in the twentieth century. These three sisters would harness the power his sons needed to rule all vampires. Their blood alone would be the cure.”
