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Chapter Nineteen
Phoebe
Rhett shakes his head. “No, Skids. You’re not any different from any of my other members. I wouldn’t treat you differently. I just came to make sure everything was going okay, and now I’m trying to figure out why Phoebe looks like she’s afraid of me. I trust you. I do, but I need to know if the two of you are feeding into some kind of shared psychosis and going off the rails.”
“What are you talking about?” I ask, stepping forward from where I’ve hidden myself behind Josiah. Rhettistreating Josiah weirdly, like he thinks Josiah is holding me hostage or something, and I’m not sure why.
Rhett’s eyes skitter up and down my body before stopping at my lower legs. “Are you okay?”
“I’m fine. What are you saying? Why do you think something bad is going on?” I’m sure it looks weird to him from his position, but I am okay. Nothing even remotely strange has happened. Josiah has been helping me, but Rhett is trying to make it seem like Josiah is dangerous.
“You’re covered inbruises, Phoebe,” Rhett says, looking pointedly at my shins. “What the hell is going on in there?”
I am covered in bruises, but I never once thought about how they’d look to someone else. “I’m clumsy,” I explain. “We run. I’m always falling down when we work out.”
“He’s not going to fucking believe you,” Josiah grumbles behind me. “There’s nothing you can say that’s going to make him trust me.”
What the fuck is happening here? I feel like I’m in a fever dream. Just a few minutes ago I was teasing Josiah and we were having fun, and now I feel like I’m in the midst of a standoff between two gunslingers about to turn this into a shootout.
Why wouldn’t Rhett trust Josiah? And why does it matter? It’s not like Rhett is going to try to take me away. Right?
“There are curtains up,” Rhett says, nodding towards the windows.
“What the fuck?” I shout, finally stepping in front of Josiah and blocking him with my body, putting my back against his chest. “I have bruises because he wants me to be ready to fight someone off in the future when I go back to the real world, and I’m clumsy as fuck so I’m always falling. There are curtains up because I asked him to play a movie for me, so he had someone bring pizza and hung the sheets up over the windows to make it darker, like a theater.
“I’m not sure what you think is happening here, but I’m certain you’re wrong. Josiah never hurt me, and he wouldn’t. Everything was fine before you pulled up and started acting like an asshole. As far as some kind of mass hysteria between the two of us, that’s not happening. Why are you acting like this?” I have to convince him to believe me, or hemighttry to take me away, and there’s nowhere safer for me than right here.
Rhett’s eyebrows pull together over his eyes and the slightest grin cracks his lips as he looks over my head at Josiah. “You have your own guard dog. She’s feisty.”
Josiah’s chest relaxes against my back and his hand goes to my wrist, rubbing a circle against the back of my hand again, forcing calm into my body with every stroke.
“Is she having nightmares?” Rhett asks.
Nightmares? How the fuck would he know about that? I tilt my head back to look at Josiah but he seems confused too. And why is Rhett talking about me like I’m not standing right here?
"No, the nightmares have stopped," Josiah answers. "We're doing fine, Pres, just keeping a low profile."
"The lowest, apparently,” Rhett mutters, throwing an unimpressed look at both of us. “I know you're not putting those bruises on her, so what's that about?"
"I'm clumsy. I fall a lot," I reiterate. Sometimes Josiah tackles me, but he’s not hurting me on purpose. He’s trying to teach me to protect myself, and I’ve been bitching and moaning about it this entire time but now I think I can see why he does it. There are more dangers outside the gate than I ever knew about.
Josiah’s fingers tighten against my palm, digging his thumb deeper until it nearly hurts, but I think this time it’s meant to comfort him more than me so I don’t complain. “She’s a bad runner.”
I’m tempted to argue that statement, to tell him that I’m only bad because he chases me and pushes me to my limit, but everything feels shaky and uncertain right now. I feel like Rhett is trying to rescue me back from my rescuer, and I don’t want to go. “I’m okay, Rhett. I’m safe and fine and all that. He’s not hurting me. I’m fine.”
Rhett inhales deeply and exhales slowly, like he’s calming himself. “I expect you to be present for Church next time and every other time,andI want you to be sure to fucking answer me when I reach out to you. Don’t have me come all the way out here to talk to you through a fucking gate. I know you’re a good man, Skids, but you have to take care of yourself. I can’t let you keep her here if you’re losing it.”
“He’s fine! Why are you being so weird? You’re the one that’s losing it.”Especially if you think I’m leaving here. Rhett can’t keep me safe at BIBO. Tony or his buddy or whoever got the note to me regardless of everything that should have stopped that from being possible. Since I’ve been here, I haven’t gotten another note. I haven’t even gotten the sensation of being watched that I’ve lived with for a long time. I’m safer here than I have ever been anywhere else.
“Phoebe, Josiah gets paranoid and freaks out-”
“That’s why we’re inside a maximum security prison for two? I’m aware. I’m fine, like I just told you, and I’m not going anywhere.” I take a step back, pushing Josiah backwards with me. “We’re fine. He’ll answer the next time you call.”
“If you need anything, Phoebe,anything,you can call me.”
“Okay,” I respond, because I can’t call him, but admitting that is only going to cause more of a problem. I force Josiah back another foot and his hand at my wrist doesn’t move. “I really appreciate you checking in, Rhett. We’ll see you some other time.”
We get through the first door and I watch as Rhett mounts his motorcycle and drives away, leaving the haze to drop over me again. That was my old boss, scared for me, acting like something bad is happening to me that I might need to escape from. Sadness is the only thing that breaks through the anxiety of what just happened.
