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Damn him.
Damn him.
He knew just how to pull at my heartstrings, how to make me vulnerable and weak, all things I didn’t allow. He’d been dead wrong that I believed him a fool. I hadn’t had a chance to correct him before he hung up on me, and I’d been too stubborn to call him back. There was no problem with him knowing I respected him, but a big one if he knew how much I cared.
He had no issue with telling me his feelings, not in words but through his actions. I borrowed his truck, no questions asked. He’d packed a cooler full of Dr Pepper and water for the trip. And the damn playlist he’d loaded . . . I’d tried to turn it off, but couldn’t because it was from him. All the things he wanted me to hear that I wouldn’t otherwise listen to.
For eight hours, I’d tortured myself with song after song, but the one that began to play on the outskirts of Burdett nearly did me in. The opening line to “Close Enough To Perfect” struck me right where it was supposed to, square in the chest.
My nose tingled, an unfamiliar sensation before what usually followed. Tears. I refused to let them fall, even as my throat clogged and I jabbed the repeat button, a glutton for punishment.
Easton saw me the way I wanted him to, but only him. I allowed myself a moment of what-ifs that were never meant to be, shutting those feelings down as I neared the Jacobs Ranch.
Somehow he threatened the whole structure I’d carefully built around myself. He had the capability to break through my walls. Hell, if I was honest with myself, he already had. As much as I didn’t want to, I cared about him, about what he thought, and hated he could hurt me when no one else could.
In the distance, the house I’d grown up in was lit up, with wreaths on every window. The tree twinkled from the living room picture window, and the front door was framed with white lights. This place grounded me, and I needed that more than ever.
I backedup to the fenced pasture Mitch had told me to put Ragnor in. Glancing at the temperature on the dash, it was forty-two degrees outside. The cold hit me when I hopped out of the cab, and I instantly shivered. After I’d opened the gate to the fence, I swung the trailer door wide, and Ragnor bolted out.
“Welcome to paradise, handsome,” I said as he took off, running out his frustration. I knew how he felt. Being cooped up in the cab had been taxing for me too.
“I appreciate that, but unfortunately I’m not interested. You look too much like my sister, and besides that, I’m a newlywed.” My brother Stone leaned his forearms on the gate and propped a boot on one of the bottom rungs. “Who’s that?”
“Ragnor.”
“Ah, the wild beast. What’s he doing here?”
“I wanted him to be with family.”
Ragnor galloped around, zigzagging in the moonlight. I couldn’t tell if he was happy or irritated. He appeared even more majestic here.
Stone cocked his head toward me. “You didn’t tell Mama and Dad, did you?” he asked.
“Nope.”
“How long’s he gonna stay?”
I shrugged.
“When are you gonna tell me what the hell is going on with you?”
“Enough with the inquisition,” I snapped. He arched a brow at me. I took a deep breath and let it out slowly. “The last twenty-four hours have been total shit. It’s being flung at me so fast I can’t dodge it all. I’ve been cooped up in this truck all day. I’m tired—”
“Come here.”
He opened his arms and embraced me in a tight hug. I relaxed against him, feeling a moment’s reprieve from everything going on. It had always been that way when Stone hugged me. His shoulders were broad, which made it so much easier for him to hold tight, and consequently, his hugs were like a soothing balm. I’d missed him. Ragnor reared up and made a sound of protest. Never pictured my boy as the jealous type.
“On a scale of one to ten, how pissed is Ruby that I’m late for supper?” I asked when I let him go.
“Maybe a five. Granddaddy made his special eggnog, so she’s pretty good right now.”
“Ragnor, could you come here please?” It took him a minute. The stubborn thing had to do everything in his own time, but he eventually complied. I stroked his nose. “You were a good boy today. We learned a little bit about each other, didn’t we?” He snorted, nuzzling my hand. “This is Stone. You can trust him too. But eventually you’ll work that out for yourself.” Ragnor eyed Stone suspiciously, who made no move to touch him. My brother was the best damn person I’d ever seen with a horse. He could work miracles with even the wildest of the herd. I’d have brought Ragnor here sooner if Stone had been around instead of shooting movies here, there, and everywhere.
“Pleased to meet you, Ragnor,” Stone said, producing a cube of sugar from his pocket. Rage sniffed it and turned his head. “Make yourself at home while I borrow your mama before our grandmama comes looking for us. You’ll like her too.”
I started at what Stone had told my horse. I’d never thought of myself as his mama. Never thought of myself in that capacity at all. It was both scary and not so bad all at once.
“You’ll be okay here,” I promised Ragnor, and he took off again. We watched him for a minute longer before turning toward the house.
