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“No.”
“Or the last?”
I never thought I’d have to atone for my sins. There was no heaven for me, and I didn’t know what to expect in hell, though I suspected an eternity next to my father. I didn’t want to tell her of the terrible things I’d done, but if it was what was needed to move forward, it was what I’d do.
“No.”
Her gaze remained focused on her fingers, which were working furiously, knotting and unknotting in her lap. I wanted her to look at me. Then again, I was afraid to see what she thought. Every chance I’d had to keep her and Gabriel was completely obliterated.
Desperation kept me talking. “The people I’ve killed, they were dangerous, evil people who’d destroyed lives. Maybe that doesn’t make it right, and it doesn’t justify how much I enjoyed metering out justice, but they weren’t innocent.”
“You liked it?” The horror in her voice was unbearable.
“Sometimes.” I reached for Mama’s rosary. “It was the only way I had a chance to do something right.”
She blanched, and whatever hope I’d had for a future with her shattered. I didn’t blame her. I was ugly.
“You belong to a monster who can’t let you go.”
Her eyes snapped to mine, her expression guarded.
Bzzz. Bzzz. Bzzz.
Her phone vibrated against the countertop, but she made no move to answer. She continued to stare as if she were searching for something. What I didn’t know.
The noise ceased and immediately started again. She scowled but answered.
Even though she didn’t have the phone on speaker, I heard every word.
“It’s me. If you don’t pay them, they’ll kill me.”
Chapter Forty-Four
Holly
Oh God.Oh God. Oh God.
Relief and fear streaked through me at the sound of my brother’s voice. I was already reeling from everything Carlos had told me. As if a man who was a killer knowing about Gabriel wasn’t bad enough, Jason had surfaced.
I was happy he wasn’t dead but furious with him for worrying me. For being so stupid. For putting me in this position.
“The police are looking for you.” Not very hard. After a day or so, they’d backed off the search. Jason wasn’t important enough to continue to spend valuable resources.
“They’ll never find me.” He sounded cocky. I recognized that tone all too well.
“Are you high?”
“Are you going to help me?”
Carlos looked ready to yank the phone from my hand. I almost wished he would. This was too much.
“That’s aiding and abetting, Jason.” I pressed my lips together.Damn it.Why did he always put me in these positions? And why did I feel obligated to help him?
“THEY. WILL. KILL. ME.”
I held the phone away from my ear at his shout, tempted to hang up. Carlos clenched his jaw and tapped out a text message on his own phone.
“You should’ve thought about that before you got involved.” I tried and failed to keep my voice even and in control.
