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“I can’t keep her,” I said quietly.
Her expression turned serious. “Then why are you messing around?”
“I can’t stay away.”
“You better figure out a way to hold on to her,” she said.
It was impossible. I just couldn’t help myself. Garrett Calhoun . . . unicorn and rainbow chaser.
“I’m not good enough for her.”
Ma’s chair scraped when she stood. She clasped my face in both of her hands. “Don’t you ever speak about my son that way.”
My eyes rounded.
“Get that shocked look off your face. You’re a good boy. Protective. Loyal. And don’t think I don’t know about how you foot the bill for all your brothers.” She shook my face. “Any woman would be lucky to have you.” Her gaze narrowed. “And if she said otherwise,she’sthe one not good enough for you.”
She kissed my forehead and returned to her seat.
“She’s never said that.”
She hadn’t. And she’d never acted that way either. Teague, on the other hand, had made his opinion clear. But I didn’t much care what he thought. Beau was the one who mattered.
“Good.” Ma forked a bite of frittata. “You need to stop carrying everyone’s problems on your shoulders. They’re grown men. It’s time they figure out how to fix their messes themselves so you can focus on your own happiness.”
“I’m not happy unless my family is.”
Her eyes got glassy. “Your father is so proud of you.”
I glanced away and swallowed around the lump in my throat. “I let him down. I couldn’t save him.”
“Oh, Cal. It was an accident. A terrible, cruel accident. You did all you could. No one blames you.”
Her words were meant to soothe, but I couldn’t believe her. It was my fault. And if they didn’t blame me, they should.
“It should’ve been me. You and Pop had plans. He was gonna take you on a cruise.” My fork clattered to the table. I couldn’t eat anymore.
“He’d be devastated to hear you say that. If anything, he wanted you to have the best life in the world. And he’d be furious to hear you gave up on that girl because you don’t think you’re good enough.” She pushed her plate away. “And we shouldn’t have planned to take that damn cruise. We should’ve done it. Life is too short.”
Every sentence was like a slap in the face. Pop’s death had made me realize just how precious life was. But it hadn’t mattered because I’d lost the person I lived for. I trudged on because I loved my family and my job.
What good was any of it without Beau?
“Ma?”
“What is it, baby boy?”
I wasn’t good enough for Beau, but I wasn’t going to let any more life pass me by.
“I need Grandma Calhoun’s ring.”
Chapter Sixteen
Beau
“Would you rather stay here?”
I lifted a brow at Cal’s question. Teague’s apartment was chaos. There were people and dogs everywhere. And it wasn’t a small space.
