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19
It’s well into the late evening when I feel the bed depress beside me. Saint’s powerful arms envelop Ciara and me as she sleeps in my arms. She was having difficulty going so long without her daddy, so I indulged her. Saint nuzzles into my neck and hair. He smells of Ivory soap and blood. I have been around my fair share, and the smell is distinct and hard to cover, especially if there is enough of it.
I wiggle against him so he knows I’m awake and here if he needs to talk. He doesn’t. He holds us tighter until he finally drifts into soft, calm breaths. I lay with him until, finally, my bladder demands I take immediate action. I snake down the center of the bed to the end and head for the toilet. I can see the void my absence has made between them in the early morning light. The girls and Sully made sure the cabinets and fridge were full, so I decide that I’ll cook, do my morning meditation and have my sip.
I’m not a coffee drinker unless it’s midday, frozen, then covered in caramel and whipped cream. I check the fridge and grab what I need to make rolled omelets and big fluffy Japanese pancakes. Since I’m pretty sure this man is a total carnivore after a cursory glance, I get out a pound of bacon and some sausage patties. While the meats are cooking in the fryer, I sit on the deck and do my stretches. With everything happening, I need this quiet time.
“Nee, Nee?” I hear Ciara’s soft little voice.
Turning, I see her rubbing her eyes with one hand and scratching her butt with the other. I chuckle. “You smell the food?” I stand from my stretches, watching her as Uzo whimpers. The other two are still slugged out on the living room couch. Ciara nods. “Would you like to help me with the eggs?”
She gets a confused look before turning her head, then she grabs my arm, pulling me not toward the kitchen but the hallway.
“Potty?” I question. When we hung out together, I took her any time we got near a bathroom because being three and still in pull-ups is damn inconvenient for both of us. She nods again with a giggle as I get her in the bathroom and on the booster.
I fix my hair and give her some privacy, which leads to her humming a tune and tossing her legs as they hang down. She is so damn cute. I can not wait until she sees it too.
Hands washed, we head out. “Hey, go wake daddy, and I’ll walk the puppies, okay?”
“Da! Da! Da!” She bounces off. She’s come a long way since a week ago when she was just a shy violet in her daddy’s arms. Amazingly, it’s been such a short time. I managed to find love in a world that I tried to run from. A world that is dangerous and limited, yet these people seem to care about each other. It’s not like the ownership of the Dominican families or the unquestioning loyalty of the Yakuza.
I take the dogs down the stairs and into the courtyard that separates the housing units. Waiting for the dogs to do their thing, I pull my robe around my ankle-length cotton nightgown as I hear a clink of glass. Turning my head to the sound, I see Sully and Monroe. Sully looks like he’s crashed in the chaise lounge on the patio of a bottom floor unit while Monroe is pounding a forty-ounce beer.
“Breakfast of champions?” I ask as he spies me.
“Always, babe. Saint still sleeping?”
“Not for long, if Ciara has anything to say.” I look at Sully again. “He had a long one.”
“He was with Bree mostly then was supposed to be helping Ainsley.” Monroe takes another swig of his drink. “He likes his coffee black, and he probably won’t speak much today. Something about watching a dick fall off seems to do that to people.”
I feel my brows twist. “Did you say-”
“Dick fell off-yeah.” He shudders, then shrugs. “Guess I wrapped the elastic too tight.”
Bailey snorts, getting my attention. “Look, um, if you are hungry, I’ve got enough bacon and sausage in the fryer to feed a few men.”
“Ain’t gotta ask me twice.” Sully stands. “You had me at sausage.”
Monroe snickers. “I bet she did.”
“Stuff it.” Sully picks up the puppies, and Bailey walks past me up the stairs, then stops. “Food?”
“Right behind you.” I look at Monroe. “Well?”
“Yeah, just let me piss, then I’ll be up.”
With a dip of my head, I go to finish up the food. Entering the house, I see a three-foot-tall naked blur run past me, giggling and being chased by puppies.
Shaking my head, I see Sully poking at the fryer, the coffee pot is low, but there’s no sign of Saint. “You see him?” I ask. He points toward Ciara’s room. Heading that way, I knock lightly.
“You don’t have to knock. It’s not like I’ve got my dick out playing with it in the kid’s room.”
“I was taught that if it’s a closed door, you knock.” I enter to find him sitting on the toddler bed, coffee on the side table, his head between his knees. I sit beside him, placing my hand in the center of his back and giving him a gentle rub. “How’s my handsome man?”
“Honestly?”
“Always.” I let my head fall on his shoulder.
‘I’m so fucked in the head I don’t know which end is up. Everything I thought I knew turns out has been a lie.” Saint shakes his head and sniffs, wiping his face on his shoulder. “The man I always thought was my father wasn’t. Turns out the one that gave me life killed him. Lead us all to fucking believe that he had cancer. I’m twisted and fucked up, but who the fuck thinks of that shit?”
“Apparently, someone that got what was coming to him.” I hold him closer. “I promised a naked little girl that I would make her a pancake and rolled omelet. You wanna come to help put pants on her?”
“I tried, but she ran away.”
