AllFreeNovel
Share Us
I sat back on the sofa and read over my notes until the door opened again and Travis appeared, looking – quelle surprise – exceptionally pleased with himself.
‘Good to meet you,’ he said in his dulcet, silken tones. The lift doors seemed to open automatically for him as he approached and I watched him glide regally inside, oozing self-confidence.
The casting director poked his head around the door. ‘Jack?’ he said, sounding confused, as though he’d never seen the name Jack before in his life.
‘Hi!’ I said, jumping up and jogging towards the door. Be positive, I chanted in my head like a mantra. You can do this.
‘I’m Andy Gold,’ he replied, holding out his hand. I shook it, embarrassed about how gross my sweaty palm must feel.
‘Thanks for seeing me, Andy,’ I said.
‘We’re going to put you on tape, but keep the script in your hand if you need to.’
I nodded, walking into the centre of the room and standing on a cross fashioned out of grey gaffer tape. There were three people sitting behind a table in front of me and not one of them looked up because they were too busy talking animatedly about a résumé and headshot that clearly weren’t mine.
‘OK, guys, this is Jack,’ said Andy, joining them at the table. ‘Jack, this is Pamela McCarthy, executive producer of Project Afghanistan, Kevin Saul, our series director, and Toby Smart, script editor at Lightning Productions.’
They all smiled thinly at me and I smiled back, feeling sick and hot and doubting I’d be able to remember a single thing I’d rehearsed.
‘Jack, the project as it stands is pretty top-secret. What I can tell you is that it’s in a similar vein to the Emmy-award-winning show Homeland, which I’m sure you’re familiar with.’
I nodded, rubbing my hand on the back of my neck. Because I was being so closely observed, I was aware of every single thing my body did, every muscle twitch, every blink. I wanted to appear self-assured and relaxed, but I thought I was probably coming across as the complete opposite.
Andy continued, ‘It centres around the stories of three men and a woman returning from the front line and the effect it has on their families and their relationships.’
‘Sounds absolutely amazing,’ I said, meaning it. This was exactly the sort of work I wanted to be doing.
‘Any questions?’ asked Andy.
‘Um,’ I said, desperately think of something because it always made you look that extra bit invested in the project. I’d gone completely blank, of course. ‘I don’t think so. Thanks.’
‘Great, let’s get started. I’ll read with you,’ said Andy.
I brought the pages up, high enough so that I could read them and low enough so that they wouldn’t be seen on camera.
‘And … action,’ called Andy.
I transported myself out of the stuffy, white windowless studio and into a soulless, grey FBI investigation room in Washington DC. I imagined I was in big trouble and that I was being questioned by my boss.
‘I told you already, I can’t remember.’
Andy responded with the right words but zero emotion; casting directors were notoriously terrible readers.
I looked down at the page and picked up my next line, remembering to look up at the end to really ‘deliver’ it. And so the scene went on until, with relief, I reached the end without any major fuck-ups. I let myself breathe again and relaxed my shoulders, which I could feel creeping towards my ears.
‘OK, Jack, good,’ said Andy. ‘Let’s try to pick up the pace a little. You can keep some of your nice pauses in, that’s fine, but it’s a fast-paced show in general. And up the stakes a bit – make this mean even more to Samuel.’
I nodded, my mind reeling. Higher stakes. Pace. I chucked my script on the floor – I was going to have to take a risk and go all out.
I performed the scene twice more and by the third attempt I was completely in the moment, in Samuel’s head, reacting to the lines as though I was him, feeling myself sprouting sweat that wasn’t because I was nervous, but because Samuel was. When I’d finished, I saw the series director nodding his head. Even Andy looked impressed.
‘Do you need me to do it again?’ I asked hopefully.
It was a funny thing that sometimes an audition was the only chance you got to actually act. I felt that same thrill I got when I was on stage; real people had been watching me and – even better – seemingly enjoying my performance. For once, I had a really good feeling about it.
‘I think we’ve got it,’ said Andy, scribbling something in his notebook. ‘Your awkwardness actually brought something different to the role, didn’t it guys?’
All three of them mumbled enthusiastically in agreement.
I wasn’t sure I’d been going for awkward, but if it worked for them, who cared?
‘We’ll be in touch with your agent by the end of the day,’ said Andy. ‘Are you free for call-backs later this week?’
‘Absolutely,’ I said, trying to be positive but remembering I’d heard him say exactly the same thing to Seb.
Still, it couldn’t have gone any better. I should be proud of myself for five minutes instead of putting myself in a foul mood because I was already envisioning the worst-case scenario. The thing was, I really, really wanted this job, and if I didn’t get it, I knew exactly how painful it was going to be.
