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I felt like there was a hole where my stomach should be. I was used to being the best in my year at drama school and now suddenly I wasn’t even the best of a group of twelve. I didn’t know what had changed. I thought it might be the fact that I’d been acting (or doing voice or movement or singing or whatever) all day, every day for three years at drama school. I’d been at the top of my game, totally focused with absolutely no distractions. I’d done a few shifts a week in a nearby pub, but other than that I’d lived and breathed acting. As time went on, I felt less and less ‘ready’. There was such a long gap between auditions that I often felt rusty. I’d do classes every day if I could, but, of course, they all cost money that I just didn’t have and now it seemed as if I was just getting further and further from my dream.
‘I didn’t think it was that good, did you?’ said the girl next to me snippily.
I shrugged, resisting the urge to bitch just because I was insanely jealous. Anyway, there was nothing negative to say. It had been great, and that was the end of it.
When Seb came back, I said, ‘Excellent, mate’ and he gave me the smug, knowing smile I’d seen myriad times before.
I sighed, watching Dax drag his stool centre stage and leap onto it again.
‘Nice job, all of you,’ he began, looking at his watch as though he couldn’t wait to leave. ‘Some of you are almost there; some of you have a lot of work to do. But the four people who impressed me most, and who would be getting a call-back are Seb, Saoirse, Imogen and Isaiah.’
The four chosen ones beamed. I clapped reluctantly.
‘Oh, and if I was feeling generous, also Jack Maxwell.’
Generosity or not, I perked up, my heart pumping. I hadn’t completely fucked it up then. My mind began ticking over. At the end of the session, I’d cruise casually past and ask for his card. Then I’d get Chad to drop him a follow-up email; maybe we could even arrange a trip to LA. Things were suddenly looking up.
