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Chapter Thirteen
Baxter
Fuck. I’m reeling after my meeting with Jax. When he called to say he wanted to meet with me I wasn’t expecting that he wanted my help. I didn’t expect to be roped into his elaborate revenge plan. But I’m glad he called on me.
For four years now I’ve been trying to convince Charlotte to let me do something about Tilly. But the stubborn headstrong girl always refuses. She insists that she’s got all the closure she needs for Lizzie, through Michael’s death.
Obviously it’s bullshit.
Closure wouldn’t make her scream at night. Closure wouldn’t make her constantly look over her shoulder in fear. Closure wouldn’t manifest in a fear to commit or be intimate with anyone. She keeps everyone at arms’ length. Hell, she’d probably even try to keep me away if Phoenix didn’t love me so much.
I never expected for those girls to worm their way under my skin. When Charlotte fled the scene of the crimes - the fire and Michael’s death - her grandmother once again whisked her away to the sanctuary of my grandfather's island. Freshly graduated from the prison that was Knox academy and looking forward to a long hot summer of sun, sea, and sex with scantily-clad beach goers, imagine my horror when I was met with, not the feisty young woman who had remorselessly stabbed me a few months before, but the broken fractured pieces of a girl who had lost everything.
Over the time she spent on the island with me, I was able to get her to slowly open up and trust me. She never told me the full story, but I got snippets...enough to piece things together myself. When she could no longer hide her pregnancy, I confronted her, but she would never admit which of the four was the father. I don’t think she knew. Not that it mattered. She had no intention of seeing any of them again, and despite offers of support from our grandparents, she was determined to go it alone. Actually, now that I think about it, she spent that whole summer majorly cock blocking me. I never noticed at the time. All of my enjoyment came from taking care of her and slowly helping to rebuild her into the strong person she was before.
Not that she ever fully recovered, of course.
Then she left. And I right royally fucked up. I gave Rebel a head’s up on which flight she was on. Luckily, they never caught her, and she never learnt of my betrayal. We kept in touch throughout her pregnancy and I took her advice and went to work for my grandfather - starting at the bottom and working my way up - earning the reins he would pass to me. I wanted to be worthy of the power; Charlotte made me want to do better. Be better. But I never wanted to be a hero; not Charlotte’s, not anyone’s.
Then Phoenix arrived. Charlotte’s second chance; her daughter rising from the fiery ashes of her past. After one glance, I was hooked. She stole my heart; cemented my life-long bond with Charlotte. I’ve been by their sides every step of the way ever since. And I’ve never regretted it. Never longed for the chaos of my past.
But if I’m honest with myself, Jax’s plan has got me excited. He’s stirred something in me that I thought was dead, or that I thought I had at least outgrown.
The need for chaos. Destruction. Pain. The need to cause all of those things. Jax’s plan has awoken the dark dormant monster within me that now rises, hungry, and calls to be unleashed.
Exhilaration, potential, the unknown...it all crackles along my skin with palpable possibility. I’m excited, thrilled, aroused.
Tilly is going to get so much more than she deserves.
Charlotte’s Diary
03/11/9
In a moment of weakness, I allowed Cordelia to talk me into moving in with her. I’m not quite sure what I was thinking, other than I can’t hide in Baxter’s flat forever and I don’t want to raise my baby girl all on my own. So I said yes, and I went back.
Cordelia is like a different person compared to the summer. She’s so excited to be having a great-granddaughter, and she's been really supportive.
Things are much better between us, and Baxter seems happy that we’ve made up and that I have a support network around me. I think he was worrying about me being alone. Cordelia may not be an army of help, but she certainly has the power of one!
When I told her what the hospital had said, especially about the baby being a little on the small side, she instantly sprang into action, getting me the best vitamins and putting me on a strict and healthy diet.
It’s funny how militant she’s been about these things, but it is nice to have someone that cares taking care of me.
