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“Hush, there’s an equal number of slices.”
“But I’m hungry. Starved in fact,” I tease, deliberately trying too hard to keep the tone light.
“You can have all the pizza,” Axel replies.
“Tonight?”
“In the world.”
“What’s the catch?”
“There is none. I’ll give you the world if you’ll let me.”
“So long as it’s dough based and smothered in cheese?” I grin at him but he doesn’t return it.
He’s too serious, too intense and suddenly I’m all too aware of him on my tiny single bed, taking up all the energy in the room.
“Odi—”
I force myself to look away from his imploring gaze. It’s hard, nearly impossible, but I focus on the laptop instead.
“What did you mean when you said you never watched those films with me?” I steer the conversation to what I think will be safer ground.
“I was always too distracted, watching you. Your reactions were more mesmerising than the same old tired plots being played out on screen.”
“This plot is not tired!” I cry, ignoring the spike of my pulse and swallowing quickly. “How dare you. It’s a classic!”
“Peony—” he warns and my pulse flutters once more. Does he know what he’s doing, what that name does to me?
“Axel, don’t.”
“You asked. You can’t ask a question you don’t want the answer to. I was obsessed with you, back then,” he confesses. Do I imagine a silent still am hanging in the air when he pauses for a beat?
“You held my attention more than anything.”
The pizza is gone and he removes the safety barrier of the empty box from between us.
“I think about that night all the time – if your mum hadn’t come home…” He lets his what if settle in the air between us. It’s not like I haven’t thought about it myself. Obsessively, over the years.
If things had played out differently, would he still have abandoned me and made the others drop me? Or did he do that because things didn’t play out the way either of us had hoped? Was it a deliberate manoeuvre to distance the guys from me, so that he could make me his own, but then with some time and distance he changed his mind?
I have so many questions and zero energy to engage in an emotional battle of wills or the past with Axel.
“I’m tired,” I say softly.
“We should sleep,” he replies as I say, “You should go.”
He scoffs. “I’m not leaving.”
“Axel—” I aim for cajoling but it comes out reproachful.
“No, Odi,” he snaps, finally losing patience with me. It’s a miracle he lasted this long to be fair. Most out of character, but I knew he couldn’t keep up the ruse of being Mr. Nice Guy for long. My tea hasn’t even gone cold yet. “Let’s address the fucking elephant in the room. You’ve been through several major traumas in the last twenty-four hours alone. Don’t even get me started on the last few weeks—”
“Whose fault is that?” I mutter.
“So if you think I’m going to let you out of my sight for even a damn second, you’ll be fucking lucky. The only reason I let you shower alone is because I’m painfully aware of what you’ve been through and I didn’t want to trigger you—”
“Though you have no problem triggering me by being in bed with me—”
