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I don’t manage another word because Axel’s mouth descends upon mine and suddenly he’s kissing me into silence.
Into submission.
And for a crazy moment of madness, I let him. His tongue battles with mine, the kiss unlike anything I’ve ever experienced before. It’s as demanding and brutal as the boy doing the kissing. Not that Axel was ever really a boy.
I’m crazy. Certifiably insane because I even try to kiss him back, but Mr Domineering isn't having any of that. His hand tangles in my hair, wrenching my head up and to the side so that he can kiss me exactly how he wants and I don’t even register that he’s manoeuvring me until my back hits the door once more.
And then sanity returns to me. I shove hard at his chest but he simply pins my arms up above my head and bites my lip. I groan, kiss him back, and have to seriously remind myself to bide my time.
When Axel finally breaks to catch his breath, I bring my knee up as hard as I can between his legs. I do not like being pinned or kissed without my permission. And I’ll never give Axel Abbot my consent. When I make contact and he wheezes out a curse, I slip by him and pull open my door. Pushing him out of it, I smile sweetly in his face while he gapes like a fish at me.
“The only thing I need keeping safe from, Axel Abbot, is your controlling fucked up mind games.”
Then I slam the door on his face and flip the lock, just to be sure.
“Who am I killing this time?” Axel sighs, dropping into a seat beside mine. He’s joking. Mostly. He hasn’t actually killed any of my boyfriends. Yet. Though that kid that bullied me for a few years did mysteriously disappear. Pretty sure he transferred schools though.
“No one. This guy is really…great,” I finish rather weakly. Axel spots my lack of enthusiasm of course and raises an eyebrow at me.
“Great? Wow I don’t think I’ve ever heard such an underwhelming accolade.”
“It’s just—” I begin. And then I pause with a deep sigh. I love the guys, but they’re guys through and through. Sometimes I need a little girl talk.
“It’s just…c’mon, Peony, you can tell me anything. What’s his name?”
“Promise you won’t kill him?” Axel smirks at my request. I’m not stupid. I know what he gets up to when I’m supposed to be tucked up in bed. I know they’ve joined some sort of gang and are doing dangerous things. I just don’t understand why.
“For now. But when he hurts you, all bets are off.”
“His name is Chad. And I really like him,” I admit. I still feel awkward discussing this with Axel, but at least the others aren’t around to witness my embarrassment too.
Axel snorts.
“What?” I demand.
“What kind of a name is Chad?”
“What kind of a name is Axel?” I fire back, scowling.
“So what’s the problem?” Axel sighs.
He’s not you.
Any of you.
“He...I don’t know. Something just doesn’t feel right,” I admit, reluctantly.
“So dump him.”
“Shouldn’t I give him a chance?”
“Peony, if you’re not feeling it at the start, it’ll never come. These things don’t grow with time, they fizzle out.”
I consider his words. It sort of makes sense. Axel’s relationships all seem to fizzle out pretty quickly. The others too. But I have to disagree. Not that I can tell him that. My feelings for the three of them have grown over time. What started as an innocent crush in primary school has become a burning secret I battle every day to hide.
“I just want you to be happy, Peony,” Axel tells me with a soft smile. My stomach flips; I love it when he’s like this. Softer, kinder. Only ever when we’re alone though.
“Well at the moment I’m happier with him than alone,” I confess quietly.
