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“Thanks for that!” Gray called out in obvious irritation. Roman laughed and waved a hand over his head.
* * *
“Catch you later,” Hunter said, forcing a smile to his lips as he bumped fists with his classmate. As nice and funny as the guy was, Hunter had struggled to stay tuned in to the conversation, just like he’d struggled to keep his attention on the professor. Three hours – three hours since Roman had kissed him goodbye and Hunter felt like he was dying inside. How the hell was he going to make it four more days? Yeah, they’d agreed to video chat every night but it wouldn’t be the same as feeling all the words Roman spoke through his touches. And he didn’t even want to think about how hard it would be to have to sleep without Roman’s arms wrapped around him.
Hunter forced himself to take a deep breath as the familiar itch began under his skin. His first appointment with his new therapist wasn’t for four more days and he was starting to regret that he hadn’t said yes when the receptionist asked if his need to see someone was urgent.
The three weeks since he’d been to the CB Bar Ranch had been some of the most stressful of his entire life because he’d gone from having every aspect of his life decided for him to suddenly having no one but himself to rely on. And to his own secret shame, there’d been a couple of times where his freedom seemed to come at too high a price and he’d considered admitting defeat and calling his father. But there’d been high points too. Like when the student advisor had asked him what kind of career he wanted, he hadn’t immediately blurted out the stock answer of politics that had been hammered into his brain for as long as he could remember. He’d just sat there in stupefied silence until the kind-hearted woman began asking him probing questions about what kinds of things he liked. And even when he’d finally settled on an engineering track, she’d made sure he understood that he could change his mind if he wanted to.
After that, he’d thrown himself full force into breaking free of his former life. And while he hadn’t actually told his parents he was done with them, he’d ignored all their calls and had ultimately gotten rid of the phone they were paying for. He’d also moved to a different dorm and worked with the university to make sure his information wasn’t shared with anyone. There was always still the stress of knowing his father could show up on the campus one day but it was something he’d just have to deal with if and when the time came.
But for all the progress he’d made coming to terms with breaking free from his parents, Roman had been the one part of his life he couldn’t find the strength to pursue like he wanted. His mind just couldn’t wrap itself around the possibility that someone like Roman could possibly want to explore a relationship with someone as fucked up as he was. Roman was successful, confident, driven, focused – he needed someone who could complement those qualities, someone who could challenge him…not someone who was struggling to accept who he was and what he’d done. So he’d written those texts as a way to stay connected to Roman, even if it was only one-sided. He’d told himself over and over to delete them…to delete Roman’s number entirely - but he hadn’t been able to bring himself to do it.
And then by some miracle Roman had been there.
Hunter’s plan to go to the lake had been last minute but he’d decided he needed a chance to say goodbye…to Pops, to Roman. But it had turned out to be too painful and he’d been about to pack up his things when he’d seen the flash of light coming from the trail. And in the seconds it had taken for Roman to reach him, to feel his lips covering his own, Hunter had known that what he felt for Roman wasn’t going to go away…it wasn’t going to be ignored. And if Roman’s words and actions were anything to go by, hopefully those feelings weren’t one-sided.
Grabbing his phone from his pocket, Hunter glanced up to make sure no one was in his immediate path and then began typing out a text to Roman.
Miss you.
He was in the process of putting the phone away when it vibrated in his hand. When he saw Roman’s name, he automatically smiled but as he read the text he couldn’t help but frown in confusion.
Miss you too. Look up.
Hunter was about to start typing another message when a new text popped up.
Look up.
Exasperated, Hunter finally looked up and then stopped in his tracks when he saw Roman standing near the stairs that led up to his dorm. Not caring who was watching, Hunter hurried across the space separating them and threw his arms around Roman without hesitation.
“What are you doing here? Did you miss your flight?”
Roman gently pushed him back and said, “I can’t really miss my flight since it’s my plane.”
Under any other circumstances, Hunter would have remarked on that interesting tidbit that Roman had failed to mention but something in the way Roman was holding himself had Hunter going on immediate alert. “What? What is it? Are you okay? Did something happen?”
“I’m fine,” Roman quickly said though he actually stepped back when Hunter tried to touch him. “Who’s the guy?”
“What?” Hunter asked in confusion. “What guy?”
“The guy back there,” Roman said, motioning to the corner behind him where he’d said his goodbyes to his classmate.
“Oh, um, just this guy I met in my physics class. I’m a couple weeks behind everyone else since I transferred into the class and he was offering to help me get caught up.”
Roman nodded slightly but didn’t say anything and Hunter’s fear went up another notch. Why wouldn’t Roman touch him? Look at him the way he always did…like he was exactly where he wanted to be?
“Roman, what’s going on?”
Roman’s eyes dropped to the cement sidewalk and his hands disappeared into the pockets of his long coat. “Can we talk in your room?”
Hunter managed a nod but nothing else because it felt like he’d swallowed a beach ball. This was it…this was the moment he’d been secretly fearing since he’d woken up in Roman’s arms after making love to him by the lake. Roman had finally come to his senses.
By the time they reached his dorm room, Hunter was already mentally trying to figure out where his nearest lighter was because he could already feel the black swirl of pain churning deep in his body and spiraling out to his limbs. He tried shaking the sensation away by subtly clenching and unclenching his fists but it wasn’t working.
“Where’s your roommate?” Roman asked as he closed the door.
Right, because Roman wouldn’t want an audience for what he was about to do. “Um, he’s gone for the week…some kind of family vacation I think,” he answered dully.
