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“Listen, Parker … I don’t know if I’m the person to make you happy. You seem to want more from me, and I’m not sure I can give that.”
“I want you,” he rushed out, cupping my cheek. “You’re beautiful; how can I not want you? Every guy I know is jealous I got you before anyone else. You’re everything I’ve asked for.”
It was a compliment, wasn’t it? Then why did he have the knack to cheapen it? Was I compelled to make such argument because he wasn’t like River?
If I broke things off with Parker now, I would never know if I could make it work with another man. It had only been a month. Surely, I could give it a couple more before making such brutal judgment. After all, he did want me, and his loyalty should account far more than his nuances and blunders.
Staring deeply into his eyes, I released a defeated sigh and made a small decisive nod. “We better get in before my neighbors starts listening in. This is not the kind of drama I want to get noticed,” I muttered before moving past him as I fished out my keys and opened the door to my apartment.
Setting my things down on the glass table, I closed my eyes as I heard him in the background. Not before long, I felt him stand behind me, searing his hot lips on my exposed shoulder, slowly, eagerly.
“All this tension … I can make it go away,” he whispered before I felt his hardened state pressing against my bottom.
Sex. Would it solve our problems? I wasn’t sure, but Parker was getting emboldened with each passing second, gripping the side of my hips as he began to gradually rub against me. Confused as I was, the heated friction woke something within me. I couldn’t deny how my body reacted to his unsubtle ministrations. It had been years since I had fully gone all the way with another man. Maybe he was right … Maybe this could be a good thing.
Appearing calm and collected, I stood idly by as he took charge, daring in his approach with my body. Compared to River’s rough, devour you effect, Parker took his time, seducing me into submission. It was imperative he did in case I decided to change my mind.
He took his time taking my clothes off, while I still remained unresponsive. Call it nerves but I couldn’t bring myself to look at him or utter a damn thing. And when he gestured to carry me to bed, I knew backtracking from here on would be near impossible.
Dazed, I watched with mixed emotions as he carefully put on protection. Parker’s lovemaking was just as slow, and there were times when I wondered if reading the grocery list was more exciting than him pleasuring himself with my body. I did feel satisfied, but a mind-blowing experience it wasn’t.
The whole experience left me reeling that I couldn’t wait to be relieved of him. So, when Anton came knocking on my door, begging for a girls’ night out with Kells, I jumped at the chance to be alone with my friends and with my troubled thoughts. More pointedly, River’s face and how impossible it was not to feel as though I had just betrayed him.
Crazy didn’t even cover it.
