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“Since you’ve already made up your mind, I can’t force you to stay with me. I’ve held you down, fought you every time just so I could keep you. But this isn’t what I envisioned my future with you to be like, Gisele. You’ve had one foot out the door, biding for the right moment to eject me for good. We both know you’ve been trying to get away from me for quite some time now, and as much as my heart, my mind, and body repels the thought of losing you, I have to do the right thingthistime.
“You are your own woman, and if I can’t make you happy, then there’s nothing I could do to alleviate the problem. But I do want to clarify some things. Yes, I gifted her a home. Since I had informed you about her, moving her closer to me made perfect sense because my punishing schedule prevented me from seeing her as often as I liked. And you’re right, I was drawn to her partially because she reminded me so much of Paige. Somehow, I had felt back then that I was actually trying to revive the same feelings as well, but it never happened. It didn’t take long until Irealizedwhy.
“The baby—her mad idea came about while we were having sex. After leaving you, I would see her sloshed and out of my mind drunk, and as harsh and unfeeling as this may seem to you, I just wanted a body to fuck. It didn’t matter what I agreed on so long as she let me into her body. I’d wake up the next day and squash the idea, but the same thing happened during night time. I drank myself into a stupor so I could drown you out of my thoughts, and it also helped to stop me from driving back to you, past caring if Rinaldi was enjoying your body, a body that should’ve been mine. You promised was mine. Everything shifted for me thatnight.
“I’m not making excuses for my past actions. They are what they are. I’m not perfect. I’ve made countless mistakes where you are concerned. To be quite frank, I honestly had no clue how to deal with my riotous feelings for you, and I admit I’m not proud of how poorly I handled it. I’m sorry for all the grief I’ve caused you.” The heavy-laden weight in my chest delved deeply into my soul. The despair and senselessness were almost unbearable. It felt as though death itself was breathing down on me, slowly suffocating me. “Whatever you need, whatever you wish, just say the word and it’ll be yours. My lawyers will grant you everything.” Slowly, gently, I lifted my face off her neck before my lower body withdrew from hers, retreating, then strictly staying to my side ofthebed.
Gisele remained mum. I supposed she had said her piece, and there was nothing left for her to say. Drilling holes into the ceiling, I was left paralyzed as I listened to her soft sobs. For a grave hour, I endured the eviscerating agony of drowning in her cries, and the second it died down, I died alongwithit.
“Jared?”
My heart thudded, revived at the sound of her calling out to me. Had she changed her mind? “Yes?” I responded in a measured tone as hope slowly flourishedwithinme.
“When the time comes, do you promise to teach me and take me under your wing once I’m ready to work for thecompany?”
There you had it. If I needed any other confirmation, thiswasit.
Pressing my temple, I heaved out. “Of course, I’m always going to be here for you,Gisele.”
“Thankyou.”
The headache turned into a full-scale migraine. Sleeping was out of the question. Everything in me hurt, and as much as I wanted to prolong parting with her, if I didn’t get out of this bed, I might suffer a heart attack. Tensing, I mustered enough courage to shift my body and sought her for the last time. Her back faced me, and I was quite relieved that I didn’t have to look her intheeye.
Pressing my lips to the base of her neck, I breathed her scent once more, and for a brief moment, all the pain left me, only to return once my nose left her skin. “I love you,kitten.”
Gisele froze as she heard the words out of my mouth. I didn’t say it to change her mind. I did itforme.
Sliding out of bed, I rapidly scoured the closet for clothes, and in less than a minute, I was dressed with my keys in hand. Gisele knew I was leaving her, but she didn’t even turn around, utter a peep. She just carried on ignoring me. I stood a few feet away from the bed, willing her to turn around, to say something—anything—to keep me from leaving, butnonecame.
“I’ll have my things out of the house once I’ve purchased a home in the area. So, I’ll leave you be. Take care, okay? I know security does a good job keeping a close eye on you, so I won’t be doing any of that. Just—I…” My voice got stuck in my throat as emotions seized me, preventing me from speaking. Biting down on my lip, I longingly glanced at her form before turning around and heading straight to the door and out of her lifeforgood.
I’d lost the most important thing in my life. As much as it pained me to admit the truth, Gisele had never wanted to stay, and I couldn’t go on wondering when she’d hurl the word divorceagain.
Gutted, I drove to the Four Seasons, checking in for the next month since going home to my house in Pacific Heights was out of the question. With the obliterating migraine threatening to explode in my brain, I was glad the concierge provided me some pain reliever before I drowned myself in a bottle of cognac. I drank it all to the verylastdrop.
I went to work slightly drunk, but I needed to occupy my mind with work. And true to her word, my lawyers blasted my phone about the impending divorce. I simply commanded them to give her whatever she wanted. If she wished to take me to the cleaners, go right on ahead. I didn’t careanymore.
My day was already in the shitters, and when my phone rang and flashed Rose’s name, I shut it off completely. A man could only endure so much pressure before folding, and I’d rather invest all of my energy into work than dwell on my unfortunate misery of losing Gisele all overagain.
I was sure she’d be seeking Wyatt once again. She might even have him back on our bed by tonight. The very thought of it made me want to murderthemboth.
Furious at the world, I punishingly worked until midnight before going back to the hotel to try to sleep. I hadn’t had shuteye in the last thirty-six hours, but the moment I tried, my body became restless, so I drank another bottle, numbing me completely. Drunk and surprisingly aroused, I palmed my cock as I recalled her tight sinuous body and how it eagerly responded to me. Even on our last night, her hate couldn’t prevent her from opening her wanton body to me. The soft choking cry she had made each time I went past her barrier brought more blood rushing into my manhood. I vividly pictured her with my eyes shut, plunging deeper as I took her willing cunt to do my bidding…We were like a wildfire—fiery and consuming, burningunchecked.
Mywantonwife…
“Gisele!” I screeched, viciously jerking my length before I pettily came into my hand. The immediate feeling of senselessness enveloping me right after twisted darkly into the very fiber ofmysoul.
FUCK.
I wasn’t daft. I understood the gravity of my actions, and I was quite certain Rose had done her best to deliver the news with a blunt blade, prolonging Gisele’s misery. But all of this had happened before she and I had decided to be together. Surely, she could make some concession in regard to the blatant fact? I dreamed of her taking me back, that my phone would randomly get a call with her begging for me to come home. It had made me relativelydelusional.
Not only did my heart yearn for the woman but also the sense of belongingness washing over me, the sense of completeness coming home to her. It was what I missedthemost.
But it was all gone, and quite predictably, I was left to pick up the fragments of a shattered shell ofalife.
Our impending divorce was in the works. It was like a black ominous cloud hovering in the distance. A bone-chilling cold wind gusted through me, a warning of a storm brewing ahead. It gradually closed in on me. Slowly. Steadfastly. And upon its menacing arrival, it would pull me down until I was stripped of all I came to be, all that I was. It would rob me of my love and whatever else I valued. It would drown me in every way possible. She’d be unforgiving, heartless,andcold.
Gisele was passionate in nature with equal strengths of ice and fire. When the fire dissipated, the cold settled. She burned ice. It would match her glacial frosty eyes that reminded me so much of a chilling winter dusk—barren to the naked eye but with underlying force hidden below their surface. She’d consume meunapologetically.
With Gisele’s unconcealed animosity towards me, it didn’t take a genius to grasp how she’d be. But alas, I had wronged her, and I was willing to pay the price of mymisjudgments.
After all, the woman held the cards to my completeness, and she knew it, too. Lock, stock, andbarrel.
