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Chapter Thirty-Seven
If she let Umbra throw her off, she could sustain some injury or worse, get trampled by the agitated horse. Thus, Jenny’s slackened grip regained life.
“Easy, Umbra!” she called, glancing at the approaching figure. “Calm down, my dear. We need to leave this place.”
What was I thinking, coming out here by myself at this hour?She admonished herself, clenching her jaw.
“Shhh.” Umbra tried to rear again and the figure stopped approaching. They raised their arms in a gesture of surrender.
“I mean you no harm. I promise.”
Jenny squinted into the darkness to make out the man to whom the familiar voice belonged. "Phineas?"
“The very one,” he responded and her body slackened with relief. Only then did she realize how afraid she had been. He took hold of his horse and continued his approach.
“It’s good to see you, Phineas.” Umbra was calm now and she stroked her mane. Speaking with Phineas seemed to lower her defenses.
“Good girl,” he said, aiming to stand in front of Umbra. “You did well, protecting your mistress when she recklessly ventured into the night alone.”
“Protect me? She nearly threw me off.”
“But she did not. Perhaps she knew you would hold on. She warned you of danger.”
“You’re no danger, Phineas.”
“No, I am not but it could have been someone else.” He was frowning when he looked up at her. “What are you doing here by yourself in the dead of the night, Jenny?”
"I wanted to blend into the darkness," she heard herself respond, her voice small and fragile.
Rustling sounded from a nearby bush and Umbra became restless again. Phineas immediately took hold of her reins and gently cooed to calm the mare down. As Jenny watched him with the horse, something about his demeanor seemed different. A certain ruefulness tinged his otherwise jovial features. She supposed he had troubles of his own. It would explain why he was out at this hour, too.
"Do you realize how reckless and dangerous that is?" he asked. Before she could respond, he turned to Umbra. "Perhaps we are going about this the wrong way. Can you dismount, please?”
Jenny dismounted and allowed him to take care of the horse. She surprisingly took to him, even nuzzling his hand fondly. He dipped his other hand into his coat pocket and extracted a cube of sugar, giving it to her.
"That's it, girl," he encouraged as she heartily lapped it off his hand. “We should give her a moment to calm down without you being atop her.”
They led the horses away from the fields and back to the cobbled roads of the park. After securing them to a tree, they took a seat on a nearby bench. The lump in her throat grew and she fought the emotions she had been repressing. She wanted to share her pain with someone who would understand and perhaps advise her but she didn’t want to burden Phineas with it.
"I suppose it is now my turn to ask you what you are doing out here by yourself in the dead of night," she said, drawing the lapels of her cloak together as a gust of cool air rushed past them.
"Same as you," he replied. "I am trying to blend into the darkness."
If she were herself, she would have given him a witty rejoinder but she was taken aback somewhat by his response. Tonight, Phineas was a different person altogether. His effervescence was buried underneath solemnness. Jenny did not like it. "And were you successful?" she asked.
"That depends.” He stared ahead. They were sitting near a lamppost and she could see his pensiveness.
"On?" she prodded.
"It depends on what your perception of darkness is."
"Whatisyour perception of darkness, Phineas?" Jenny was seeking to help him if she could.
"Patience,” he said a moment later. "If you ask me, Jenny, I would say that patience through trying times is the one most difficult thing in the world. Those instances when you try your hardest to pull through but every effort you make rebounds in your face.Thosetimes are the darkness."
Jenny felt the same way about her life. She had been patient yet more patience was being asked of her. Every time she had tried to reach her husband, something had come between them. "Sometimes, I feel like the world is mocking me," she murmured, staring into the distance as Phineas was doing.
"Precisely," he agreed. A disquieting silence settled between them before he broke it with, “To answer your question, I needed some fresh air tonight to brood. Coincidentally, you needed some fresh air, as well.”
