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“I know it’d be a scandal, but Eloise…you can’t see yourself from my eyes right now, but I promise you, you look terrible. It scares me.”
“I’ll be all right. You really shouldn’t worry,” was all Eloise could say.
“Have you feelings for the Duke?” Kate asked abruptly. Eloise’s body suddenly stiffened up. “Shhh, don’t answer that; Felicity is coming.”
Felicity’s pink gown swooned left to right as she paced toward them with a satisfied smirk on her face. God knows what she wanted at this moment, but she came toward them, her eyes cast upon Eloise.
“This isn’t the drinking table,” Felicity noted.
“It isn’t indeed,” said Eloise.
“I don’t think James desires you very much,” Felicity continued, “I saw him flirt with a few ladies. Are you okay with that?”
Eloise shrugged. Even if it were true—there was no doubt in her mind Felicity would purposely conjure tales just to upset her—Eloise didn’t exactly care. In fact, she hoped that once they got married, he would stay as far away from her as possible and would spend time in brothels, gentlemen’s clubs, or any place men go for pleasure.
Realizing Felicity was still awaiting a response, Eloise said, “I don’t particularly mind.”
“Don’t you think it’s improper?” Felicity squinted her eyes, glancing through the crowd of the ball. “Oh, would you look at that,” she exclaimed, pointing subtly yet aggressively at a figure moving from one side of the room to the other. “It’s Lord James. It seems like he’s leaving.”
“Oh, come on, Felicity. For once in your miserable life, just be happy for her,” Kate replied.
Eloise ignored her cousins’ conversation and instead focused on James. He was indeed dashing across the ballroom, his eyes remained fixed to the floor, and his body jostled against the crowd as he tried to make way. He neared the entrance door and finally exited the building.
“Oh, but he did! Eloise, I think your betrothed just abandoned you.”
“All right, that’s enough,” said Kate. “Felicity, come with me, please, I need your help with something.”
Sensing Eloise’s uneasiness, Kate dragged Felicity away, leaving Eloise to her solitude. The ball suddenly turned quieter as she traveled to her thoughts and ignored her surroundings in hopes that everything would go away. Maybe the marriage with James would end up being a nightmare, and when she awoke, she would find herself back at Castle Richmond, with Simon beside her, pleased to see her awaken from her unconscious state after the accident.
Staring at the edge of the ballroom, Eloise noticed a vaguely familiar arch door, one that led to the backrooms and, hopefully, away from the crowds and into the gardens. It was dark and gloomy, and no one neared it; there was no reason to, after all. As she made sure that no one was looking, she found herself slipping away and disappearing into it.
The light from the corridor ahead allowed her to see where she was heading, and she remembered it all at once, far too well. It was the same door from last time, the same one that led her to find James kissing another lady and the one that had led her to cross paths with that masked man, the one who had stolen her first kiss. Determined to escape the commotion, she hurried her pace, searching for the gardens.
And soon, she finally reached the veranda door, hidden away behind a dangling curtain. Her feet carried her deeper into the garden, the fresh, chilly air brushing against her face and finally allowing her to breathe. The tight feeling in her chest gradually faded, and her thoughts returned to Simon. As obscure as it was, as improper and odd, she wished he was also in attendance. It would make the intolerable ball at least a little tolerable, even if he simply stood watching from afar, glancing at her at times. Anything to indicate their past together was not merely a dream she had fabricated for herself.
She moved closer toward a willow tree by a bench, leaning against its trunk, supporting her body against it and sighing. Humming. Her eyes stung with tears, yet they wouldn't fall, no matter how desperately she tried. She had no tears left to cry.
“So what is it this time, curiosity…or simply neglect?” a vaguely familiar voice called out from afar.
