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Chapter 26
He made love to me twice more during the night. More importantly, when I awoke the next morning, Finley was still there. He’d been watching me sleep, his head propped on his hand.
I rubbed the corner of my mouth self-consciously, wondering if I’d been drooling. It was a bad time to remember I had never removed my mascara the night before.
“Shouldn’t you be working?” I said, glancing at the clock on the wall.
A slight frown appeared between his eyebrows. “Are we going to pretend this never happened?”
“Of course not. It was fun.”
The frown deepened. “Have I done something to upset you, McKenzie?”
“Not at all.” I winced inwardly at my chirpy tone. “Everything is great.”
He reached out and touched my hand…the one that I had unconsciously fisted in the sheet. “Talk to me, Duchess.” His tone and his smile were gentle. “Tell me what’s going on inside that head of yours.”
“I should move to a hotel,” I whispered. Everything that had happened was too much, too fast. I didn’t have a clue how I was supposed to act, much less any idea of how to protect myself.
He sat up and scraped both hands through his hair. “Sex is not a requirement for staying in my house. I told you that in the beginning. I understand the word no, McKenzie.”
Stunned, I realized that my awkwardness had wounded him. “I’m sorry, Finley. You’re missing my point. I adore being in your bed.” And I adore you. “I’m afraid if I hang around too long, it won’t be easy to leave.”
He shrugged. “So stay longer. Your friends could go back on their own.”
As an invitation, it lacked a number of details. Why stay? For how long? Is this a veiled commitment?
I reached for his hand and rubbed the back of it with my thumb. He had a cut beside one knuckle. “I have to go home,” I said quietly. “My ticket can’t be changed. I have responsibilities and obligations back in Atlanta.”
“What does that have to do with going to a hotel right now?”
Stupid, obtuse man.“I don’t want to fall in love with you, Finley. I’m too damn close already. Now do you get it?”
Shock flickered across his face. Men had an aggravating ability to compartmentalize. Sex was easy and simple and soon forgotten. “So you’ve shifted the romantic fantasy portion of your trip to me?”
I wanted to smack him. He seemed stunned that I would be so blunt. “This isn’t a game,” I said. “Maybe to you. Not to me. I haven’t had a great track record when it comes to men and sex. I suppose I expect too much. I don’t want to get my heart broken again. I don’t think you have any ulterior motives when it comes to me…it’s not that. Still, I’m too old to play around with my emotions.”
“I see.”
I knew that by putting all my cards on the table I was risking everything, even the short-term pleasure of sharing his bed until I headed for home. “Why don’t we take a step back?” I said. “Give ourselves both time to think. I’m not going anywhere today.”
“If that’s what you want.”
When he climbed out of bed, I was treated to a full view of the man in all his glory. I had a sick feeling it would be the last time I’d ever be this close to him. I wanted to grab him and tell him I was an idiot and beg him to come back to bed.
Ironically, Finley had given me the confidence to make the hard decisions. It wouldn’t hurt either of us to take stock before we went any farther.
He put on his pants and gathered the remainder of his clothes. At the door, he paused, his back to the room. At the last second, he turned around and stared at me. “What are your plans for the day?”
I lifted a shoulder. “I don’t know. If it looks like good weather, I might do some photography here in Portree. Interesting buildings…water shots…that kind of thing.”
He nodded. “We could have dinner at Hamish’s if you’d like.”
The visible peace offering lifted some of the burden on my heart. “That would be lovely.”
* * * *
The rest of the day passed in a weird sort of limbo. I spent a number of pleasant hours walking the streets of the charming waterfront town. I had a large memory card in my camera. It was already approaching its limit. Tomorrow I needed to spend some time uploading to my computer and deleting the duds.
