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“Of course not.” I summoned a smile. “Why would you say that?”
“So maybe you’re still in search of that illusive Scotsman? Hoping to find him in Inverness before your time is up?”
I think he meant the question to be lighthearted. Instead, I heard anger and frustration in his voice.
“You are who you are, Finley. I am who I am. Let’s be glad for what we’ve shared in these few weeks. The situation with your father is going to reach a critical point soon. You’ll have to help your sister.” I paused. “This thing with you and me was never going to be forever. I knew that.”
“Of course,” he said. The ice in his words made me flinch inside. “If you’d been more clear about your departure date, I’d have planned a going-away party.”
“I didn’t decide myself until yesterday. Now that you’ve made peace with your dad and Vanessa, you don’t need me anymore.”
Desperately, I wanted him to contradict me. To tell me he loved me. To forbid me to leave.
Apparently, my fairy-tale story didn’t end that way.
Finley nodded curtly. “Let me know when you make it to Inverness. So I’ll know you’re okay.” He stepped toward me and kissed me briefly on the lips. “Goodbye, Duchess.”
* * * *
I turned and fled. Somehow I made it out of town and took the correct turns. Every emotion was locked down. I clutched the steering wheel and stared at the road, determined not to cause an accident.
Once, I had to stop for a small herd of sheep.
Still my eyes were dry.
At last, I crossed safely over the Skye Bridge and onto the mainland. Not long after, an unlikely moment broke the dam on my tears.
Ahead of me sat the majestic Eileen Donan Castle, settled like an aging queen on a small peninsula in the loch. I hadn’t stopped on my trip over toSkye. Once I met Finley, I had counted on him taking me to the castle one day. He said it was a grand idea and promised we’d make the time as soon as the motorcycle was done.
I pulled to the side of the road and let the tears fall.
Something about castles always reminded me of Outlander. I hadn’t really expected to find an eighteenth century Scotsman to fall madly in love with me. That was completely illogical.
I certainly hadn’t anticipated visiting a stone circle and being whisked back to the 1700s. Everyone knew time travel was a fun idea but highly impractical from a scientific point of view.
So what did I expect from Scotland? And why was I so distraught?
It was my own fault, really. If I had not lollygagged in Inverness that first day, if I had made it to Skye in broad daylight, I would likely never have met Finley Craig. I would have stayed at Cedric’s house—bad as it was in the beginning—and ridden out the storm.
I’d told myself I wanted solitude. Instead, I had found love.
The thing about visiting a very old country was that it put things in perspective. How many men and women had walked these moors? How many had faced grief and loss, famine and death? The old world, the time of Outlander, was not a forgiving place. A woman’s tears were worth very little.
What mattered were the bigger causes.
And yet, against all odds, men and women still fell in love. Somehow I would have to find the resolve to be thankful for my adventure and never to let my two friends see how deeply I’d been hurt during my Highland sojourn.
For the next three days, I checked obsessively with the desk clerk at my hotel for messages. I knew very well that Finley could find me. Days ago he had asked me where I stayed when I arrived from London. Inverness was either a large town or a small city. Any way you looked at it, even if Finley had forgotten the name of the hotel, he would be able to locate me.
Every day he didn’t come, I fell deeper into my pity party for one.
After the fifth day, I knew my Highland hero wasn’t in love with me…not even a little bit. No amount of pep talks made me feel better. I was desperate for my friends to return, so I could go home and get over this painful chapter in my life.
The Saturday morning of our rendezvous dawned bright and beautiful, worlds away from the dreadful weather that had greeted us upon our arrival weeks before. I checked out of my room and asked the hotel to store my bags until mid-afternoon.
My two friends and I were to catch a three o’clock train back to London where we would spend the night near the station and fly out of Heathrow the following morning.
I made a point of arriving at the cafe early. The lunch menu, though small, sounded delicious. I selected a table, ordered a cup of tea, and sat down with my back to the wall. I didn’t want any surprises. If I could see Hayley and Willow coming, I’d be able to compose my expression and greet them with appropriate excitement.
