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Upstairs, he peeled Ayla out of her outerwear. Felicity took off her own coat and boots and began unloading the deep compartment on the back of the stroller. “I had planned on ordering a small pizza,” she said, “but if you’d like something more substantial, we can get Chinese. Or whatever you want.”
She followed Wynn as he took the baby into the living room and set her in front of her pile of toys.
He straightened and stared at her. “Is Derek in the running for happily-ever-after?” The words had sharp edges.
“Derek is a friend. I’ve known him forever.”
“I’m sure you have,” he said quietly. “You even told me so. When I asked if you had someone in mind to marry and have babies with, you said there were plenty of choices. And you mentioned colleagues, in particular.”
She shivered with nerves. “Derek recently got engaged. He wanted to tell me in person.” She was losing Wynn bit by bit. She could sense it. So it was now or never.
Inhaling sharply, she gazed at him, willing him to listen. Her pride didn’t matter anymore. “Derek has always been just a friend to me. But I love you, Wynn.”
His face went blank. Then he paled. “Don’t say that.”
“I have to. It’s true.”
“It’s the holidays making you sentimental.”
“Don’t be ridiculous. I’m in love with you. Maybe at some level I never stopped loving you. But it’s different this time. I’m not a kid anymore.”
“We’re good in bed. That’s not love.”
His words hurt her badly. “You can’t tell me what I feel. I love you. At one time, you loved me, too. I’m begging you to give us another chance.”
“No,” he said, his tone curt.
She saw no softness in him anywhere. “What are you afraid of, Wynn?”
His eyes were blank. “Nothing. I’ve spent years learning how to survive and thrive on my own. It’s all I know now. And I like it that way. I can’t be the man in your little fantasy. That’s not me.”
Tears stung her eyes. “But when you make love to me, it feels so real.”
His jaw tightened. “Women are good at deceiving themselves.” He lifted one shoulder and let it fall...a fatalistic shrug. “You told me you wanted to leave New York. So go. I think that will be best for both of us at this point.”
“But who will look after Ayla?”
“I’ll find someone.” His features were carved in stone, remote...unforgiving.
“You told me I’m the only person you trust to care for her.”
“Well, I was wrong, then, wasn’t I? There will be others.” The stoic expression in his green eyes scored her soul. “Did you call your mother?”
“No.” She wanted to say it wasn’t any of his business, but things were bad enough without provoking him.
His jaw tightened. “Even though you told me you would?” He glanced down at the floor where Ayla played and then back at Felicity. His expression turned bleak. “Just go, Felicity. Put us out of our misery. If there are no flights this evening, you can grab a room near the airport. I’ll ship whatever you can’t take with you.”
Felicity didn’t know what to say or do. The situation had imploded so rapidly and drastically she was in shock. “I think you’re overreacting,” she said quietly. “You’re giving up on us, and I don’t know why.”
It was a last-ditch effort to reach him.
His terse smile was no smile at all. “There is no us, Felicity. I told you that all along. We’ve had fun in bed, but we’re done. Pack your bags. Go back to your old life. You told me from the very beginning that’s what you wanted to do. Nothing has changed.”
Twelve hours later, Felicity sat at her boarding gate, numb and filled with despair. The winter morning sky was gray and sullen. A weather front during the night had returned the city’s weather to seasonal December temps.
She should never have gone to Shandy’s funeral. Should never have agreed to Wynn’s plan.
If she hadn’t entangled her life with his, she would still have her work routines, her friends, her sense of normalcy. And a heart that was whole.
