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Chapter 23
“You’re the girl who went to California to live with an aunt she barely knew,” Jax continues. “You stepped onto that soundstage as an extra and conquered those viewers. They fell in love with you, Allie.”
My heart stumbles, wishing he’d have phrased that differently. One little word would’ve made all the difference.
“You’re still that girl. Go back home, audition for the show, and watch them fall all over themselves again. Xavier’s a dick. Everyone knows it. You know it.”
He tips my chin, his voice gentling as he looks deep into my eyes.
“You didn’t sleep with him for a reason.”
I slept with Jackson for another reason. I thought it was because we couldn’t resist each other, but here he is, resisting me just fine.
“Ready for me to head back already?” I try teasing, knowing I’m being a sad sack, feeling it in the slump of my shoulders. I didn’t mean to fall in love with him again. And he’s being so damn encouraging and has done nothing but give me what I need. How can I ask any more of him? Even with an “I love you” crowding my throat, I can’t say it. I can’t do that to him. He has a life here and I should be supportive of his dreams and desires, too.
Even if they don’t include me.
“You’ve got this, gorgeous.” He places a succinct kiss on my mouth. “Anyway, I’m done here.”
He gestures to the house in general, but I wonder if I’m included in that wave. He’s done here, and also with me.
“My parents are due home tomorrow.”
“I know.”
“I’ll spend a few days with them and then…” I shrug, wanting Jax to fill in the blank for me. He does, but not in the way I wanted.
“Back to being famous, wearing Michael Keith, and signing autographs.”
“You know me,” I say like it’s a brush-off. But he does know me. Like no one else. Better than my Mom and Dad. Certainly better than the plastic people I’ve grown to know in L.A. I mentally kick myself for including my co-workers in that mix. I really do love Laur, Shan, and Kate. And the crew. And that show. Why did it have to end?
“Want to go out tonight?” Jax interrupts my thoughts.
He’s another aspect of my life that’s ending before I want it to.
“Your place for pizza?” I’ve been over at his house countless times over the last week-plus. Our dates are more lounging around with each other in easy comfort before taking it to the sheets and burning through our pent-up sexual frustration. I thought we’d have fizzled out by now, but I want him still. Must be that love thing.
“I was thinking Cooper’s.”
I blink up at him. He mentioned a while back that if we were on a real date he’d take me to Cooper’s, where he’d taken that Kim girl. I should say no. Say no, and not give in to the worry that he might turn me down with a kiss at the end of the night. But…somehow I don’t think so. I imagine we’ll kiss and then go back to his place and then have amazing, incredible sex.
“I’d love to,” I tell him.
He kisses me, a lengthy pull of his lips on mine. When I grab hold of him to make out some more, my heart joins my arms in wrapping around him. I am so screwed.
“See you tonight. I’ll pick you up.”
I nod, wanting that to be good news. For the reasons I’ve mentally listed above, it’s not. Not when I know what tonight is.
It’s good-bye.
—
Jax insisted on picking me up. When he knocks on the door, I stand from the sofa where I’ve been waiting for him. I’ve been ready for over thirty minutes. My red high heels were pinching my toes, so I stopped pacing in favor of flipping through an issue of Real Simple magazine. It was time well spent. I now know how to properly fold a fitted sheet.
I pull open the door, prepared to tease Jax about knocking when he could’ve just walked in, but the words don’t come.
He’s in a suit.
