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Fifteen
“It never once occurred to you to have sex to scratch an itch?” Flynn asked.
They’d started with Sabrina on her knees, which thrilled him—he’d known she had confidence stocked away for emergencies—and then finished with him on top, her on her back. Her eyes had blazed into his as he’d thrust them into oblivion. They were very, very good at pleasing each other, that was for damn sure.
They were in his bed, sheets pulled haphazardly over their bodies. Between them, his right hand and her left were intertwined, his thumb moving over hers while they talked.
“Why is that so hard to believe?” she turned her head to ask.
He turned his head and shot her a dubious look. “You are a live firecracker and you dare ask me that question? What have you been doing to get by all this time?”
She rolled her eyes, but her smile widened. He’d flattered her. He liked flattering her. Almost as much as he liked having sex with her. Hell, that was a lie. He liked having sex with her more than anything.
“I managed. I haven’t seen you taking any strangers home since you and Veronica split.”
At the mention of his ex-wife, his mouth pulled into an upside-down U. The truth was, he hadn’t wanted anyone after he’d found out Veronica was cheating on him. As emasculating as it was to learn she didn’t love him anymore, that had compounded when he found out she’d been fucking Julian. He didn’t know which one of them to hate more so he settled on hating both of them. The hate had faded, but the anger was still there. She’d texted him several times today in an attempt at the lamest apology on the planet, which had downgraded his anger to disgust. Though, it might’ve been more of a lateral move.
No doubt she’d grown tired of Julian the Artist. He looked good on paper—or canvas, as it were—but where real responsibility and presence were required, he was a no-show. Julian cared about Julian more than anyone. It probably shouldn’t, but it gave Flynn a shot of satisfaction to know that Veronica was likely comparing the two brothers and noticing that even with his money and inheritance, Julian wasn’t measuring up.
“She contacted me,” he told Sabrina.
“I know.”
Guilt shadowed her face. “I was cleaning the countertop and saw her name pop up on your phone. I didn’t read the messages, though.”
“She’s sorry. Which I already knew.”
“Didn’t we all,” Sabrina said, droll.
“I didn’t run out and get laid after we split because I was heartsick and wounded.” It was the most truth he’d admitted to anyone—himself included. “She was my world before we fell apart. I should’ve seen it coming—read the signs. I don’t know how I missed it. Guess I was preoccupied with Monarch, which is a lame excuse.” Veronica had always told him he couldn’t focus on work and her at the same time. God knew he’d tried to satisfy her. Where she was concerned, filling her “needs” seemed to be a bottomless pit.
“Lame, but nonetheless true.” Sabrina squeezed his fingers before letting go of his hand and rolling to face him. He stole a peek at her breasts, beautiful and plush resting one on top of the other. He had to force himself to look into her eyes while she talked. Something she’d noticed, given her saucy smile.
“Were you in love with her when you found out she’d been unfaithful? Or had you two been growing apart?”
“We’d been growing apart...like, I don’t know, two ships drifting in the ocean. Wow, that is a bad metaphor.”
“Horrible.”
He allowed himself a small laugh. “We used to be in love. So in love we were stupid with it. We didn’t eat or sleep, we just...” He bit his tongue rather than finish the sentence. Best friend or no, he doubted Sabrina would appreciate hearing about past sexcapades with his ex-wife. “We wanted to be together all the time. You know how it is.”
“I don’t, actually.” Her eyes roamed the room, not landing on one spot in particular while she spoke. “The day we went through our list of exes, I was thinking about how sad my experience has been with relationships. I was enamored with a few, and smitten by one or two, but I never uttered the L word.”
“Never?” He didn’t like hearing that. Everyone should feel loved and love in return—at least once—even if it was misguided.
“No. I didn’t think it would change what was between us for the better.”
“And none of those guys expected you to be in love with them? I would’ve thought Phillip might’ve been chirping those three words like a smitten lovebird.”
“Oh, he did.” Her laughter softened the hard knot in his chest that had been there for too long. “He knew I wasn’t that into him, I think. Which hurt his feelings.” She bit her lip like she was debating what to say next. “When we broke up, he said it was because he couldn’t be second place any longer. He thought I was holding out for you. Wouldn’t he have the last laugh if he saw us now? Sleeping together and living together.”
Now, obviously, Flynn knew he and Sabrina had just had sex. Also, obviously, he was planning on having more sex while she, yes, lived here. But hearing that she was both sleeping with him and living with him stated in plain language sounded almost...ominous.
What would anyone say if they knew? If Gage and Reid knew the whole truth. If Veronica knew. If Julian knew...
“Yeah. Unbelievable,” Flynn murmured, his mind on the fallout. Fallout he hadn’t let himself consider before this moment. He’d been too preoccupied with enjoying himself for a change. It was nice not to play the role of Atlas bearing the weight of the world on his back.
After a long pause, he admitted something else he hadn’t planned on saying aloud. “You deserve that, Sab. That stupid love. You deserve to feel it at least once.”
