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“Wanna talk?” She gestures to my car, and I nod, unlocking the doors so we can both slide in. Once we’re comfortable, she grabs my hand and holds it in hers over the center console.
“What’s going on? I know you’re hiding something, and the only reason I didn’t call you out on it in front of the girls is because I feel like it’s a big thing, Pen. And if you’re not willing to tell us all, there has to be a reason. You never hold back talking about anything normally, so I’m not going to lie, I’m a little concerned.” She stares at me, and my heart starts racing even faster. “I would never have gotten through all of the crap with Ethan if it wasn’t for you. So now, if you’ll let me, I’d like to return the favor.”
I sigh and lean my head back against the headrest. “I met someone.”
“I kind of figured. Is this the man you, or should I say Garret, had a one-night stand with?”
I scoff. “Yeah.”
“Okay. So what happened?”
Twisting my head so I can see her again, I finally admit my conundrum out loud. “I slept with Maddox Taylor back in March.” Her eyes widen, but she doesn’t say anything. “We met at the Zio’s Vodka party my boss asked me to run point on. Initially, I blew him off. But he was relentless and charming.” I turn back to stare out the front windshield again. “I felt something with him, Amelia... something I haven’t felt in twelve years.”
“Does this have to do with your young love you mentioned a few weeks ago?”
All I can do is nod because I feel emotional and am afraid to speak.
“I see.”
But then I decide to rip off the Band-Aid because I know Amelia won’t judge me. And maybe it’s time to let it out. “He was a football player, too. And he... died.”
I hear her deep exhale. “I’m so sorry, Penelope. My God, you’ve been carrying this around for twelve years, haven’t you?”
“Yeah.”
Stroking the back of my hand with her thumb, she stays quiet for a moment, giving me some time to process the fact that I finally spoke about the confusion I’m feeling. And I’m grateful for that because I’m barely holding it together right now. My hands are shaking, and my heart is galloping in my chest. But knowing that she’s here and now someone else knows has also given me a slice of relief.
Amelia rubs my hand again and clears her throat. “So back to Maddox for a second. Based on what you said in Frankie’s when we thought you were talking about Garret, is Maddox trying to date you?”
“I guess? I mean, yes and no.” I run a hand through my hair. “Obviously, I didn’t think I’d ever see the guy again. He was in town for a few days, but he played for New Orleans. He wasn’t supposed to be in California ever again, so I thought I was safe. That’s why I gave in to what I felt for him. The choice to be with him is one I wouldn’t have wavered on before because I have always stayed away from athletes ever since Jacob. But Maddox was... enticing, to say the least.”
“I remember that. Even in college, you wouldn’t even smile in an athlete’s direction.”
“Exactly. So when I decided to go for it, I convinced myself it was just a fluke. I gave in to my body’s reaction to him, but there was something different about him. Obviously, I didn’t anticipate him being traded, and I sure as hell did not anticipate being assigned to work for the Bolts, yet here I am.” I tuck my leg underneath me as I turn to face her again. “This is my job, Amelia. And Maddox is my client now. I tried to get him to understand that nothing more can happen between us, but he keeps telling me that he’s not taking no for an answer. That he won’t stop believing that us crossing paths again happened for a reason.”
“Wow. And how does that make you feel? Do you want to explore something with him?”
“I... I can’t decide. On one hand, I can say without a shadow of a doubt that it’s been twelve years since a man has made me feel anything close to what Maddox makes me feel.”
“Which is?”
I stare out the front windshield as I put my thoughts into words. “Like I want to see him every chance I can, like I want to talk to him just to find out what’s going to come out of his mouth, that I just want to be in his presence.” A smile graces my lips as I recall our previous conversations so far. “He’s cocky, but in a charming way. He tells me dirty jokes to lighten the mood or help me relax when he senses that I’m stressed. And he even sent me calla lilies twice now because he says they remind him of me.”
“Your tattoo?”
“Yeah.”
“But he makes me laugh.” I chuckle, thinking about how he uses humor to defuse a situation just like I do. “He’s unexpected, but he’s also comforting—being around him makes me feel like this girl I left behind in Ohio...”
“He reminds you of home.”
I close my eyes. “He reminds me of a lot of things—and of Jacob.”
“Was that...”
“Yeah.”
She takes a deep breath and waits for me to look at her again. “Look, I can speak to you as a therapist, or I can speak to you as your friend. But either way, I have one question to ask you.”
