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And then Cora becomes quiet. So quiet I wonder if she fell asleep. I close my eyes for a minute and picture her sleeping with me curled up behind her. Our bodies flush and my arms wrapped around her waist. Before I ask if she is still awake, she whispers into the phone.
“It hasn’t even been a whole day and I already miss you so much.” Her voice trembles over the line and I know she is holding back tears. I won’t tell her, but I saw her collapse outside my house as we drove away. She may have thought we were far enough away, but we weren’t. And the sight of her on the ground crying crushed me. The fact I couldn’t turn the car around and go to her, scoop her up in my arms and rock her to soothe the pain, kills me.
“Me too, baby.”
“I’m getting a job soon. Save up money so I can fly out to see you. Maybe by our anniversary.”
Hope filters through her words and spreads from her phone to mine. With it, I sense her warmth and a hint of gladness. Maybe that’s what I should do too. Find a job and save money. Teens don’t make much money, but earning something is better than nothing at all. Maybe I will call it my Cora fund. Both of us can save up to fly back and forth.
“That’s a good idea. I’ll do that too.”
Just as Cora starts talking again, Dad walks into the room and signals it is time to go. I nod and hold up a finger. He taps his watch and walks out, leaving the door open. Door open equals time is up.
“Gavin?”
“I’m still here, baby. Mom and Dad said I need to get off the phone. We’re going out to dinner.”
“Okay.” Her voice drops so low I barely hear her. And I wouldn’t be surprised if the second we hang up, she starts crying all over again. I will too. Because this situation is annoying and heartbreaking and fucked up. And I hate that I can’t hold her right now. Can’t press her against my chest and rub a hand up and down her back. Can’t promise her everything will be alright. Although, the prospect of getting a job and saving to see her again lights a fire inside me.
“I wish I didn’t have to.”
“I know. I love you.”
“I love you, too. I’ll call you in the morning.”
Seconds later, and with much reluctance, the call ends. As sad and frustrated as I am with being stuck in a situation I can’t reverse, hope flares anew for us. And we both hold on to that hope with every breath we take. Because hope is all we have.
But little do we know, things don’t always go according to plan. And life has a way of throwing curveballs. Curveballs that batter and bruise hearts.
