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He seems kinda familiar. It’s not a small town, but maybe we went to high school together. I rack my brain, but come up with nothing.
The front door clicking shut pulls my attention away from the happy couple.
I suck in a breath and freeze in my spot. My stomach drops as I stare with wide eyes at the person standing in front of the door. My heart slows, and my body heats.
No fucking way.
Derek Wade.
“Em, this is Derek, Tony’s friend,” Sandra says absently. I can’t respond.Derek. I swallow thickly, remembering how we last left. We didn’t even say goodbye to each other. My heart beats slower and slower, and blood rushes into my ears. This is a fucking nightmare. I feel so awkward. I have the urge to just turn around, run upstairs and hide. But I don’t want to, I never wanted to run away from him.
He’s just standing there, casually shrugging his coat off his shoulders as if there’s no tension, nothing there between us.
He's acting like I'm no one special, so maybe he doesn't remember me. The thought makes my throat dry and close.
For me… he was my first love. I can’t deny that. Even if we were a secret.
Even if the words were never said. I wasn’t brave enough to tell him, but I know what I felt for him was love.
I struggle to breathe as Derek walks closer to me.
I can feel my cheeks flaming, and I hope it’s not obvious.
No one knew back then. I never told a soul. It was a secret. Even if we never called it that, we both knew what it was. We snuck around, fooled around. I almost gave him everything… Iwantedto give him everything. I was just waiting for him to pull the trigger and make things official. But he never did.
I wish I could look away, but I can’t. His pale blue eyes are piercing into me, holding me in place. They used to mesmerize me back then, but now they feel colder.
The heat between us is still there though. All of the feelings and memories from high school come pouring back into my mind. The nervousness, the excitement, the bliss when he first talked to me. Then the heartbreak, and rejection when it ended. God, I feel so naive. So young. So lost.
He's even more gorgeous now than he was back then.
He sure as fuck isn’t a boy anymore. His shoulders are broader, stretching the Henley tight across his chest. His arms are so much thicker, corded with muscle. He’s still tall, making me feel so small beneath him. I love it though, just as I always have. He makes me feel protected.
It’s odd because he radiates a confidence and power that would cause fear if I didn’t know him. But even after all these years, I feel as if I do know him. And he doesn’t scare me one bit.
“Derek, this is my sister, Emma.”
“Hi, Emma,” Derek says coolly. It hurts that he’s just pretending he hasn’t met me before. My heart does a flip, but the wrong fucking kind. The kind where it buckles and lands hard in my chest. The kind that hurts.
Whatever. I guess that’s what I get for leaving him. I swallow the lump in my throat, squaring my shoulders.
Once I found out he was dealing, I just didn’t want to be caught up in that. He always kept everything private. I couldn’t unsee it though. Maybe it was judgmental. Maybe I was too much of a goody two-shoes. But I was falling hard for him, and I was scared that if I didn’t leave at that point, then I’d never leave.I knew better.
My mouth is so dry.Get a grip, Emma! He's just a guy you had a thing with in high school. So what if he was my first kiss, stolen in the back of his car after school? So what if I felt more for him than I’ve ever felt before?
It's over now.
You've moved on, and he's moved on. I take a deep breath, straightening my back.
“Hi, Derek.” I finally look away, not knowing how to play this.
There’s only one thing I know for sure.
I’m lying to myself about moving on.
CHAPTER2
Derek
