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However much you are missing me, my missing you is ten-fold. How I wish we could still chat in the evenings together. Although I have my old room at Sage Brook, nothing is the same. If spirits were low here when I departed, they are even lower now. I couldn’t see Norman’s obsession before, but now that I know the name for it, it’s all that I see in his character. I feel terrible for what he’s putting Edward through.
Oh, Diana, I’m still impossibly in love! But what am I to do about it? I have made this decision, and I know there’s no turning back. I am truly surprised that Edward has not yet married. Although I think it’s for the best that Anna has not been by, I wonder why Edward is stalling. The marriage would benefit him in the future, and although it’s difficult, that’s what I want for him.
The days are rather long and dull here. I think of you constantly. One day, we shall be old maids and retire together. Maybe we’ll have saved up enough money to purchase a little cottage of our own and live happily. The only thing that would prevent that would be your marrying Graham Blackmore! Consider mustering the courage to speak with him one day. I know that he longs to speak to you. If there is a moment where it’s appropriate to tell Edward that I miss him, then please share that with him. It is very much the truth.
Sending you all the love I have,
Laura
As she put down her pen, Laura heaved a sigh. It brought her no joy knowing that Edward was miserable in her absence. Laura was no less miserable. In fact, she was perhaps more anguished than he was because she was the one that made the choice. She reminded herself that there was no turning back. The decision had been made, and Laura could never marry Edward with a clear conscience.
He needed better. Up in her room with the slanted roof, Laura considered that perhaps her dreams of becoming a governess were dashed upon the rocks. What would the future hold? Endless days in her little attic, dreaming of Edward Pembroke. If she could not be near to him, at least he could remain in her thoughts.
