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Chapter 13
Harper had explained the agreement to both Marianne and Leah. She wasn’t at all surprised when Marianne was the one to become angry. Leah was more reserved, but the angered confusion was present on her face just as much.
Within Harper, there was a peaceful feeling, almost as if everything had fallen into place. She wasn’t going to say it to her friends, but part of her deep down inside believed that maybe there was a chance of the marriage with Brian working. Maybe over time, he would bend his desires and fall in love with her. No one would believe that could happen. Everyone knew the type of man that Brian was. He wasn’t someone that loved or believed in the concept of marriage. Marianne and Leah would only want to protect her from him, and rightfully so. She had to tread carefully with her words.
“This is folly,” Marianne explained. “You do not deserve a marriage that has no love. That is entirely unfair to you. All our lives, you spoke of the traditional: meet a man, fall in love, have children, die happy together. You won’t get any of that with Brian. You’re lucky if you get a casual greeting from him. And I just know that he will court another woman while married to you.”
The thought of Brian loving her, ruled Harper’s thoughts. And that would have been the perfect time to say it. But she didn’t. Her words would be useless against something like the outrage of Marianne. Her face was almost entirely red with anger. “I know you are upset.” She had learned that defusing technique from her mother. Always be understanding when someone is irate. “But I have given it a fair amount of thought and it does sound better than the alternatives at my disposal.”
Marianne still looked angrier than a bride with wine on her dress. But she held off from saying anything else for the moment. That was good. Maybe it meant that Harper was getting through to her.
When Harper looked at Leah, she spotted a thoughtful gaze. That was just like Leah—think hard before voicing an opinion. Harper was curious to see what she would say, for her opinions always made the most sense. It was only when she was stressing over marrying Michael that she appeared out of sorts.
“Well,” Leah started while scratching her head. “It is a plan for sure. And it does sound somewhat better than what you are presented with. But I must say, as Marianne would probably agree, it is not without its pitfalls.”
The way Leah said it made Harper curious. It was like she had thought of something that Harper had not.
“You may be marrying Brian to avoid a life of shame or marriage with Michael, but people will still look at you strangely. You had your moment with Michael and that will not be easily forgotten.”
Unfortunately, Harper had already thought of that. It was nothing new to her. “I know. But as with any gossip, it may not be easily forgotten but time will make them forget. And once they see me with Brian, who will care?”
“And what happens when these people find out that your marriage is loveless? That could bring you even more shame.”
That was something that Harper hadn’t thought about. Maids were ones to talk. It could always easily leak out that Brian only married her to save her from the alternatives. But it had to be a risk she was willing to take. They would just have to be careful. Surely Brian knew the possible outcome and would do everything in his power to keep word of their loveless marriage from reaching the public. Even just thinking about it was exhausting to Harper.
“This is true,” Harper replied while taking a seat in front of both her friends. But I do not think anyone will find out. You both are the only ones that know, as of today. I am more than okay with people forgetting about my previous scandal and starting anew. I need it.”
“You do need it,” Leah said. “It has been a harrowing few weeks for you. As awful as the deal sounds, it is a way for you to finally escape the drama.”
Marianne was shaking her head.
“What is it?” Harper asked.
“There will only be a life of drama when it comes to Brian. I feel as though it is just getting started for you if you agree to marry him.”
Harper couldn’t have agreed more. But doing so would have upset her friends. She needed to play down the situation, make it seem as though it wasn’t as bad as they assumed. Leah wouldn’t be hard to sway, but Marianne would be a different story. She had to remind herself that at the end of the day, when her head hit the pillow, it was her life and not theirs.
“I would rather not assume and predict events in the future that have not come to pass yet. It is all speculation.”
“Oh no,” Marianne said, attracting Leah’s gaze in the process. “You must believe somewhere inside you that Brian might one day love you. Please tell me that is not why you are so confident in this plan.”
Harper wanted to shake her head. Not from disagreement but from disbelief over how well her friend knew her. “Marianne, I never once said that I was confident in this plan. I am going along with it because it is the best one out of the ones I am presented with. Please don’t make me say that again. I feel as though I have said it a hundred times already to myself.”
Marianne wore a stubborn look.
“She is just trying to look out for you,” Leah added.
“I know.” Harper leaned back in her seat and rested her head against the wall. She could have used a kiss from Brian at that moment. Part of her liked to think about their kisses when she was stressed. As much as she doubted it, she wondered if their loveless marriage would ever have those kisses inside it.
“Okay. Well, since you have given it some thought,” Marianne started, “I have one more question for you.”
“Ask it.”
“Are you truly okay with knowing that you will never have a husband’s love…let alone his company?”
The question was like a bullet. Even though it was nothing new to Harper, hearing it aloud made it all the more devastating. But maybe she needed that. It was a different form of acceptance. One that was a little more brutal.
All she gave Marianne was a shrug. She was in a position where she would be lonely with a husband’s protection or without –this was easily the better path.
