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“Please, just help me.”
For a moment, she thought Richard wasn’t going to. Then she felt movement beside her and glanced over to see Richard sitting on the floor with his legs crossed, picking up another book nearby and inspecting the spine. Warmth flooded her belly, and Isabel had to bite back a smile. This reminded her of rainy days when they were children when they couldn’t go out because it was pouring with rain, and they were told they couldn’t go out.
Cohen had decided the best way to pass the time was to reorganize the library. That had left Mr Sidney bewildered when he saw all the books scattered around as the organizing vanished while the three of them read instead, but it had been very enjoyable. Isabel had liked reading whatever she could reach and found herself absorbed in both fiction and things happening around them.
Richard had been just as eager to read as Isabel. He had even taught her how to read some of the more complicated words, rolling his eyes as he did so. But he always had a smile. Even when it took him away from his studies, Richard always helped her.
He had been doing that his whole life.
As they looked through the books, Isabel couldn’t help glancing over at Richard. She still remembered their journey down to Devon only a few days before, bumping around in Cohen’s carriage. Lady Dunley had been a little harassed after her argument with Lady Blythcourt, so Cohen had taken her mind off it by talking about anything he could think of. Isabel was surprised at how quickly that worked.
Which left her sitting with Richard across from her, mostly in silence. Richard didn’t seem to be in the mood to talk, spending most of the time staring out the window with a frown. Isabel took that time to actually look at him.
She found herself taking in his every detail, from his untidy black hair to the growth of a beard on his strong jaw, the way his physique was built under his clothes. Their knees kept bumping against each other, and it was difficult to stop thinking about how warm they were and how Isabel wished he had actually touched her.
Her thoughts had wandered elsewhere later that night as well, as she lay staring at the ceiling in her old bedchamber attempting to sleep. To places they certainly shouldn’t have gone to. Richard had invaded her dreams, and it had got to the point that Isabel was sure she could feel his hands on her. It had left her shaking.
What was wrong with her? She shouldn’t be thinking about him like this. Two kisses, a handful of interactions, and Richard had turned her into a mess. This wasn’t supposed to happen. Also, Richard was someone she had known since she was a little girl. How could she suddenly start thinking about him like this?
He’s not quite the same person who came back from Europe. He’s different. You appreciate it.
But he’s still Richard. The boy I’ve grown up with.
The problem was, Richard was not a boy anymore. He was a man and one that had grabbed her attention far too much when she should have been focused on her future husband. This was really bad.
But Isabel couldn’t bring herself to feel awful about it. Guilty, yes, but not too much of it.
“Ah, here it is.” Richard held up a slim volume. “Medicinal Herbs and Tonics, wasn’t it?”
“Yes, that’s it!” Isabel almost snatched it out of his hand and opened it. “There has to be something in here that can help with the fever. I’m sure I saw something here that could work.”
“Do you think it will work better than what the doctor’s given everyone? It could be that this fever’s just very stubborn and tougher to leave the body.”
“We can’t be sure of that. People can die from fevers. And I don’t want that to happen.” Isabel swallowed. “Seeing Cook like that and watching him not know who I am ... it was heartbreaking.”
She was not about to lose someone she cared for to this fever. Cook was going to get better, and Isabel was going to make sure of it.
“Isabel.” Richard touched her arm. “He’s going to be fine. Everyone’s going to be fine.”
“But how long is it going to take before that happens? Fevers take the strength out of people, and Cook can’t fight it forever.” Isabel turned another page, trying to focus on the words. “I want to get this done sooner rather than later.”
Richard didn’t say anything. Isabel could feel his eyes on her as she read, his gaze tickling the side of her neck. The fire wasn’t even lit, but the room was getting decidedly warmer.
It was then Isabel realized they had been in the same room for close to half an hour, and Richard hadn’t tried to kiss her yet. Granted, Isabel knew she should have been relieved about it, but it left a hollow feeling in her chest that he hadn’t. It hadn’t happened while on the journey to Clovewood, for obvious reasons, and it had left Isabel feeling antsy and wishing she could have another kiss.
He was too much of a distraction, and they needed to stay away from each other. Richard made her want things she couldn’t have. Isabel needed to marry well and focus on her future where she didn’t need to worry about where money was coming from. She shouldn’t be thinking about Richard.
Would she be happy with Galliston? Isabel didn’t know, but she liked to think she would be. That would make up for it.
Hopefully.
“Here we go.” Isabel reached the recipe for a tonic towards the end of the book, and she sat up. “This is it. All we need to do is get the herbs, boil them together, and then make it into a tea.”
“Does it work?”
“I seem to remember it being used on me when I was younger and I had a fever. Father said there was no need for a doctor when we could just use our library.” Isabel scrabbled under a book and brought out a sheet of paper, snagging up her pencil. “Right, once I’ve written them down, we can go and collect them.”
“Collect them?” Richard sounded surprised. “You mean they actually grow around here?”
