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“Why are you jealous?” I bite on the bottom of my lip and don’t realize it until I see the expression in Dexter’s face change. I instantly try to back pedal to safer territory before people notice our interaction. I hold up my book for poetry and give him a half smile.
“I actually have a lot of work to get done for my poetry class, so I should probably get back to it.”
I see him blink a few times to get himself out of the fog he was just in. He has both of his hands cuffed together in front of his groan and as much as I want to explore why, I know now is not the time. He clears his throat and nods toward me.
“Oh yes of course, I’ll see you in class later.”
He goes to walk away but stops and turns toward me again with a small smile.
“And for the record, I was not jealous…” I smirk to him.
“Okay maybe a little, but it just gives me more fuel to make up for all of our lost time together Ms. Pierce.” He returns my smirk before walking toward the door.
Hearing him call me by that last name reminds me of how badly I need to change it back. I know it might seem like I’m going backwards with changing my name back to my maiden name, but I know that it is better than having the last name as someone who thought cheating on their wife was okay. I zone back into the task at hand as soon as Dex walks away.Don’t lie, you took a glance at his ass before going back to reading.Before I know it, it’s time for my last class and for some reason I’m not nervous anymore.
We both agreed to learn as we go with this whole secret dating thing we have going on, but I’m pretty sure we are bombing it. Dexter slipped up twice in one day and we are lucky that no one has noticed. As I take my seat, I notice Dex isn’t here yet. I get my things out of my bag when I hear Sarah’s annoy laugh entering the room. To my surprise, she is with my boyfriend.Wow, that sounds weird to say.I instantly feel anger bubbling up in my body and try to swallow it down. I know my face is red with how heated my cheeks feel right now. I let out a few breaths to try to calm myself, I’ve never been the jealous type or at least not this bad.
I guess getting cheated on changes you, and finally getting the man of your dreams. Maybe that’s why, I’ve dreamt of being with Dexter for years and now that I have him, I don’t want anything or anyone to mess it up. I start to feel guilty for getting so angry at the littlest thing, but then I look up and see her hand on his arm again.It could be an innocent touch.She laughs and turns toward me and walks up the steps to her seat in front of me. In that moment I want to do something petty like spit my gum in her hair or pull her chair out from beneath her. I don’t know where all these feelings are coming from, usually I would succumb and let my self-doubt take the wheel. I would retreat into my pitiful corner that told me I was never good enough.
I kind of like this new Allison! Dexter turns and starts taking things out of his bag. I get a message on my phone, and I know I should ignore it, but I look down anyways.
“It was just an innocent touch, don’t go all Dwight on her and mace her.” I choke on my own saliva and can’t help but laugh.He watches The office?Sarah turns around and gives me a dirty look and I cover my mouth to try to muffle my laughter. I look up at Dexter who is tucking his phone into his pocket discreetly and trying so hard to hide his smile.
This class is going to be tough if this is how every class is going to be. Dexter starts his lesson and I try my best to not get distracted by the fact that I get to call him my boyfriend.Jesus you really do sound like a teenager.As much as I want to get lost in
his dreamy eyes, I need to stay focused on the final goal.My Happiness.He makes it so hard when he is one of the main reasons why I am so happy all the time now.
Somehow, I finish his class without any hiccups and get all my things outlined for our assignments. I almost have all of my book into my computer so I can start editing it and then after I’ll feel more comfortable with him reading it. It will never get published but it will still be good enough for our final project for this class. With that thought, I head home to finish my schoolwork since I won’t have much time tomorrow with work. My phone starts ringing as soon as I walk through the door and set my bag down.
“Hey mom.”
“Thank goodness, you’re still alive!” I laugh.
“Sorry, I’ve been super busy with school and workand Dexter.” I don’t say the latter because that is staying between dexter and I.
“Of course, baby, how are you? Is it too much?”
I know she means that question in an innocent way, but I can’t help but over analyze it and think she is trying to discourage me into giving up and going back to my old life.
“I’m fantastic! My apartment is amazing, it has a gorgeous view of this park that has a super old willow tree. I go there all the time to read and there’s a restaurant called Mama Gino’s and I think they have better chicken alfredo than Little Ricky’s, can you believe that? Oh, and my classes are great, I have a bit more work but I’m doing okay with balancing it on the days I don’t have to work…”
I realize I’m talking my mother’s ear off without letting her even answer my question. I hear a sigh and then a laugh on the other end of the phone.
“I am so happy to hear that honey!”
This is how it use to be when I was younger, I could share everything with my mother. As I got older, she started to live vicariously through me. Pushing me to try new things and to always chase after the money because you needed that to be consider successfully in life. I knew she meant the best for me, but she never truly asked what I wanted in life. Maybe seeing how happy I am pursuing what I truly am passionate about is what is bringing us back to this kind of relationship.
“I can’t wait to have you out here and to show you around. I’ll be back in New York in a few weeks for Isabelle’s Bachelorette party. I’ll come visit then, okay?”
“That sounds great honey. You make sure you’re getting rest to, okay? I love you”
“I love you to mom.” The other end of the phone grows silent, and I start to pull the phone away from my ear before she speaks up again.
“Allison…”
“Yeah mom?”
“I am so proud of you!” I’m shocked that those words just came out of my mother’s mouth, especially with my current circumstances. I feel my eyes start to burn with tears getting ready to spill.
