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“I’m instructed not to let you out of my sight.” Is all the explanation I receive as she stations herself by the door and widens her legs into a domineering stance, arms crossed in front of her chest.
Great. That will really relax me.
I exchange a shocked glance with Susanna, my massage therapist. She likes the idea of someone scrutinizing her as much as I do, namely not at all.
She points at a three-panel screen leaning against one wall, and I nod in appreciation. Pulling the partition in front of the massage table, she spreads it out. At least now I’m shielded from Oriana’s contemptuous glare.
The massage is just what I need. As the tension drains from my body, my mental clarity returns. Time to come up with strategies to get my life back.
Before this holiday, I listened to an audio series called“Think Like a Spy”on my commute to work. Hmm, did my subconscious know something I didn’t?
In the series, the former spies shared how they got themselves out of precarious situations and the lessons they learned along the way. As I try desperately to recall the wisdom the seasoned spies imparted,Susanna works her elbows into the tight spots of my lower back, making me groan. Somehow, though, this seems to loosen my memory, and all the spies’ wisdom floods back into my mind.
Jeez, what if I can’t remember it all later on? If only I could write everything down. But then Gualtiero might find it, and I’d be in all sorts of strife. He’d probably tighten security around me, and then I’d never get away.
No. I will have to do this in my head.
Let’s see… All of them ranked mental toughness as one of the most important things to cultivate. Believing you’ll win no matter your circumstances is crucial, rather than hoping circumstances will change.
Though it’s tempting to believe that “charming Gualtiero” will return, it’s unrealistic to hope he’ll see the error of his ways and let me go.
Yeah, fat chance of that happening.
It seems once he’s decided something, he’s unmovable… and he seems convinced I belong to him.
Mental toughness… I definitely need more of it!
It’s an attitude, a mindset, right? And my willpower is the most important thing in it.
I’m an independent woman. I won’t be ruled by a criminal, domineering jerk who thinks he can possess me… no matter how charming, handsome, and good in bed the jerk might be.
In the past few days, I’ve seen a side of my Mr. Tall, Dark, and Handsome that’s anything but panty melting. This side of him is dark, dangerous, and takes whatever he wants.
Remembering our time on his island and how close I felt to him, I feel myself tearing up. Part of me had hoped we could have a future together. And now I can have it, but he’s a mob boss… responsible for the type of darkness I wish didn’t exist in the world.
How could I possibly live with that? My conscience would never let me.
I can’t be part of this world and enjoy luxuries and riches that were earned with other people’s blood, suffering, and loss.
As much as I’m still attracted to Gualtiero, as much as I still feel this undeniable connection to his soul, I can’t allow him to pull me into his dark world.
The need to get away magnifies, and I decide here and now, I will succeed. I will escape from this prison.
Plan long-term was the advice from the spies. Determine your ultimate objective… I’ve just defined mine.
Freedom.
Chapter Eleven
Ella
AsIlieonthe massage table, I contemplate another piece of spy advice.
Run surveillance on yourself.
What are your strengths and weaknesses? And what strengths do you need to develop to get to what you want?
Well, looking back at my first failed escape attempt, I definitely need more planning. Still, I winged it well, given the spontaneity of my actions.
