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‘Will she get help?’
‘She might. But mental-health services are stretched to breaking point, to be honest.’
‘That’s so sad.’
‘Well, it’s very kind of you to see it like that. Not many in your position would.’
Not many would have the inside track. ‘Did she say why she did it?’
‘She reckons the dodgy poems was all she was ever going to do. For her homework, is that right?’
‘So she did write them?’
‘She did, darling.’
Samantha’s shoulders drop. At last. Confirmation. ‘That’s right. We were quite frightened.’
‘Well, it seems it was your husband she had it in for, not you. Partner, sorry.’ Another piece falls exactly where Samantha knew it would.
‘Why would she want to hurt Peter?’ Her face glows with her own disingenuousness.
‘She claimed she and Peter had a relationship and she never got over it. She said it was years ago but wouldn’t say more, wouldn’t say how she met him or when, nothing. They tried to get her to talk about it, but she wouldn’t, I’m afraid. She clammed right up apparently.’
‘Peter told me,’ Samantha blurts, unable to stand the lie. ‘Sorry, I should have said – I’m a bit all over the place – but he recognised her name, said she was an ex. He feels sorry for her too, but I suppose he can’t be blamed for whatever grievance she carried forward.’ Her breath catches. She has just betrayed a vulnerable woman, albeit one who stole her baby.
‘Ms Lewis reckoned she was trying to teach him a lesson, but she said once she’d started, it all went a bit out of control. She told you she had a child, is that right?’
‘Yes.’
‘Well, she doesn’t. My guess is that the lies got on top of her and as soon as she put the baby into the car, she panicked. She said as much, said she realised the one who’d be most upset was you. She asked the officers to tell you she’s sorry. She asked them to tell you it was never you she wanted to hurt. She just wanted to have a baby.’
‘Have a baby?’
‘You know, for a bit. Reading between the lines, she’s not been lucky in love, so to speak. She couldn’t say what her plans were regarding little Emily. I don’t think she had any, to be honest. Your guess is as good as mine. As good as hers, if you like.’
Samantha is about to tell Christine about Peter’s actions all those years ago. She should, really. But she doesn’t. Clearly Lottie hasn’t clarified the specifics. So here they are, herself and her child’s abductor, keeping Peter’s shoddy secrets for him. How utterly messed up.
Christine sighs. ‘Well, as I say, there’s nothing to be gained going after her, and it’s probably for the best for yourselves too. As I say, she clammed right up, even though something was clearly still upsetting her.’
Samantha’s stomach heats.
‘From what my colleague says,’ Christine goes on, ‘pressing charges in this instance could well backfire, you know, if she feels cornered.’ The subtext is so loud, the sense is distorted; Samantha cannot quite reach it.Pressing charges could well backfire …
‘I see.’
‘I have to go anyway, so I’ll leave you to it. Good to hear you’re coping well. You’ve got my number if there’s anything you need to talk about, all right? Anything at all.’
‘Thank you,’ Samantha manages. ‘And thanks for yesterday. I couldn’t have got through it without you.’
‘Well, that’s a lovely thing to say. Take care of yourself, Samantha; you’re a nice girl.’ A hesitation. ‘And call me if there’s anything – I mean it.’
The phone line goes silent. Emily starts to fret in her pram, desperate to be on the move.Pressing charges in this instance could well backfire … call me if there’s anything – I mean it. There it is, definitely, the indefinable subtext. Clearly Christine suspects something but is not prepared to say what.
Samantha heads down the hill to meet Aisha and Jenny. The more she thinks about the conversation with Christine, the more she is sure that there was a veiled allusion to an underage relationship, possibly abuse. How else could pressing charges backfire? Yes, it was definitely there, lurking in the words not said, not even attributable to a facial tic or gesture.Child abuseis the term that she pushes away, along withpaedophile, along withrape. Suzanne – Lottie – may not have entered into a full sexual relationship with Peter until she was legally of age, but he groomed her while still only fifteen from his position of trust.
As she walks, Samantha remembers a documentary she watched with Marcia when they were living together. The woman in question had been taken to a grubby flat with her friend when they were both fourteen. The two of them had been lured into sleeping with two seedy guys who preyed on schoolgirls, giving them free cigarettes and alcohol. There was a photograph of the girls in their school uniforms, grinning, full of it.
‘We thought it was a bit of fun,’ the woman said in the interview. ‘We thought we were rebels. It was dangerous, you know? And secret.’ Twenty years or so later, she could not talk about it without weeping. She had become an alcoholic for a time, had a history of failed relationships. Unhappiness came off her in waves.
