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Fiona
“Describe it again, I still don’t think I’m getting the full picture.”
Rolling my eyes, I toss my gum wrapper at Bea, watching it bounce off her brown skin and float to the ground by her white Converse. “I’ve replayed the scene like ten times since I got here.”
“I know, but where’s the emotion? You finally kissed the guy you’ve been pining after since middle school, but I can’t even celebrate because I don’t feel like you’re portraying it accurately.”
“It was just a kiss, Bea,” I say, flicking a piece of lint off my pink raincoat as I shuck it off my shoulders, letting it droop to the auditorium seat.
She scoffs, twirling a lock of straight black hair around her index finger. “It’s never just a kiss, Fi-Fi. Don’t act like we didn’t learn that from every single blockbuster romance growing up.”
“Those are movies,” I say. “They don’t matter.”
“They don’t matter?” She waves her hands around, gesturing toward the stage, the people milling about before practice begins. “Then what are we even doing here? What’s the point of all of this?”
Groaning internally, I lean back and rest my head against the back of my chair, strapping in for a lecture on the importance of acting and how the profession dates back to ancient Greece and is the very basis for the foundation of humanity.
It’s been Bea’s dream to get to Los Angeles since she was a kid, and she’s been dragging us to drama club at the community theater in Stonemore for as long as I can remember. Heidi and I come when we can, but every instructor we’ve had in the club has always been able to point out the differences in our attitude toward participating; Bea’s eager and ready before they ever call her name for exercises or auditions, and Heidi and I always seem to be three steps behind.
Now, though, I’m kind of grateful for the club’s distraction; just as Bea launches into her bullet points on the history of acting, Olga, our instructor this semester, waves her arms onstage and asks us to divide into pairs and practice our diaphragm breathing exercises.
A teacher’s pet at heart, Bea scrambles to her feet and skips to partner with Olga, leaving me with Heidi, who hasn’t spoken a word since I mentioned what happened between Boyd and me the other night.
Tightening her blonde ponytail, Heidi stands up, staring at me blankly. “Ready?”
I shrug, pushing out of the seat. “Sure.”
We move to a corner of the auditorium, facing each other and focusing on harnessing our pelvic muscles to push air into our chests. Or something like that. I don’t think I’m doing it right, but I don’t really care to, either.
Heidi sucks in a deep breath, then releases it slowly, her jaw relaxing on the exhale. “So, are you in love with him?”
My eyebrows raise and I sputter, some of the saliva in my mouth getting sucked down my throat. “What?”
“Boyd. Are you guys dating or something?”
“Did you miss the ending of the story?” I ask, pressing my palms flat together. “He basically called me a dumb whore and drove me home in silence. Didn’t even have the decency to drop me off at the doorstep; no, he stopped outside our gate, and I had to walk up the driveway.”
“Maybe he was afraid someone would hear his bike and question his presence.”
Not liking how she’s defending him, I shrug again, pretending it doesn’t matter. Doing what I’m best at. “Maybe. I don’t care, either way, though. It was a stupid kiss that never should’ve happened, and never will again. Just... a consequence of heightened emotions and two passionate people.”
She hums, her blue eyes narrowing, and anxiety weaves through my body like a river rushing to empty into the ocean. My heart beats hard against my ribs, and I dig my nails into my thighs until I can feel the indents forming on my skin, trying to focus on the sharp pain instead of the need to placate my friend.
Clearly, she has an issue with my kissing Boyd, but I can’t quite tell if it’s concern for the status of my heart, or something worse. Still, I do my best not to dwell on it right now—I know it’ll be there waiting to torture me when I’m alone later.
Changing the subject to school, I ask about how she’s enjoying her second semester—she’s on campus at Unity studying environmental science, just visiting for the weekend, and I can tell by the way she dives into the new conversation that she’s definitely jealous.
When I get home later that night, Kieran’s sitting at the table with Boyd and my father, and I roll my eyes at Boyd’s fucking audacity, coming here for family dinner when he sucked the soul from my body mere days ago.
I pass by the table anyway, glancing over my father’s shoulder at the documents spread out as I bend to kiss his cheek. “This is the first time I’ve ever seen you bring work home, Daddy.”
He chuckles, adjusting his glasses. “First time for everything, sweetheart. I’ve not been able to get much work done at the office lately.”
A throat clears pointedly, drawing my attention, but when I look up, Boyd’s not paying me any mind, studiously scanning the packet in front of him. I roll my eyes and walk to the kitchen, setting my purse on the island and move to wash my hands in the sink. “Why’s Kieran here?”
“Uh, I live here.”
Barely. My brother splits his time between this house and Murphy’s old cottage in the woods by Lake Koselomal, and truly, when he’s here, he’s never really here. Checks out worse than our mother during one of her episodes.
