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“Do you often cling to people you don’t like?” He took another bite and, again, inside my head I snapped my fingers like a mom on the phone, quieting my thoughts.
“I wasn’t clinging, and it’s not a habit, no.”Please, for the love of God, just leave me alone.
“For the record, I’d be okay with it being a habit.”
I clenched my jaw and my thighs. “Well, it won’t be. Again, I’m sorry. I don’t know what came over me.” I threw back the rest of my coffee, though it was still far too hot, but my throat would forgive me. I felt the caffeine working its way through my bloodstream.
I shifted in my seat, preparing to gather my things and get out of there, because the smell of his cologne took me back to being pressed against him.
“Sounds like you know what came over you.” He shrugged. “Must have been a good dream.”
I’m crawling into a hole and making a new life there.“How much of my conversation were you eavesdropping on?”
“You’re in a coffee shop. It’s not exactly private, but not much,” he said, taking a last swig of his water before reaching for our trash. “Just the part where you said I was skillful in your sex dream.” He walked away from the table to drop our things in the garbagecan, leaving his words floating in his wake. He tipped his chin down as he returned, pitching his voice low. “What was I so good at, RJ?”
I hurriedly pushed my laptop into my bag and stood, dropping my phone and AirPods into the side pocket. Lear strolled back to the table, and I brushed crumbs down the front of my shirt, his gaze following the movement of my hand. Which, of course, set my mind off down the forbidden path. I ignored his question despite the memory of the dream playing at the edges of my thoughts. “I need to get to the office.”
“On a Sunday? You’re kind of a machine, huh?”
I’d heard that before, usually with some derision or sarcasm. Case, himself a devotee of corporate culture, said it as ammunition; my friends said it kindly, but always followed by the idea that I should take a break. Lear said it like he was genuinely interested, and maybe a little impressed. “Big case,” I said, avoiding eye contact again. “Thank you for the cake.”
“I’m heading out, too. Which way are you going?” He held out a hand, motioning for me to walk ahead. He didn’t say more, which felt weightier than the questions at the table as we strolled toward the exit. But I didn’t like loose ends, particularly those ends that meant Lear Campbell knew I’d fantasized about him.
Outside, the air was dewy, just on the comfortable side of humid, and Lear walked near me, our arms occasionally brushing. “Listen,” I said as we reached the corner, “we work together. I shouldn’t have touched you, and the dream was just a dream. We should drop this, okay?”
He met my eyes and slowed our pace. “Thank you for apologizing earlier and, to be clear, I was right there with you in that alcove, but, yes, we can drop it.” He looked forward again, then surveyed the mostly quiet street. He smelled sweaty, with a hint of something inviting underneath.
“But, RJ, before we drop it,” Lear said, pushing the button to cross the street opposite from me, his body still close to mine. My gaze lingered on the button—I hadn’t pushed my own, since the streets were so empty. The heat from him was a subtle reminder we were standing too close, and I stepped back before he finished. “I’m just saying that... if you want to find out if the dream compares to reality, I’d be open to appeasing your curiosity.”
The light changed, and he gave me another grin before taking two steps backward and jogging the length of the crosswalk, leaving me standing on the corner. “We’re dropping it,” I called after him.
He’d reached the other side of the street and waved. “See you next weekend, RJ!”
Chapter 14
Lear
THE COUPLE KISSED,to the whoops and cheers of their friends and family. When Penny initially briefed me on the gas station wedding, I’d thought it was a metaphor. As I stood on the edge of the crowd near an ancient pump, I appreciated that it was unique. The couple had met while filling up in the rain, and they wanted their ceremony to take place right there. It was a small gas station in a rural area and backed up to an open field, where tables covered in board games and snacks sat under a tent. The couple wanted different. I had to hand it to Penny. This could have been cheesy and kitschy, but it was perfect.
RJ smiled as the couple broke their kiss and clasped hands. She was looking between the brides and the crowd, and her face changed a little when she did that, her smile natural. Somehow she softened. It was probably a calculated shift, but I imagined her looking at me that way.
“Marin and Lola invite you to enjoy Icees and snacks while they take photos.”
I’d already checked that the signature flavors—blue raspberry, cola, and piña colada—were ready to go and the snack options—from cheese puffs to Cornnuts to jelly beans—were artfully arranged. I’d texted my sister a photo.I have a weird job.She’d sent back a photoof a paperweight molded to look like a human vulva weighing down a to-do list that began withBuy cat food.Tell me about it.
“Nice ceremony,” I said, approaching RJ with the paperwork for the marriage license after Marin and Lola stepped away with the photographer.
She laughed, which made me grin despite myself. She had been her normal terse self the whole day, that cute flustered expression from the week before a distant memory. “It’s really a gas station wedding. I just...”
I laughed, too, leaning against the gas pump. “I know,” I said, handing her the paperwork organized the way she liked. “Fun, though.”
“Definitely fun,” she said, our fingers brushing when she took the folder from me. Her gaze shifted to the brides laughing with their wedding party as they posed near a stack of tires, and a silence fell between us. “I’m glad I let Penny talk me into taking this one.”
I rubbed the back of my neck, glancing the other way as the small crowd filtered into the tent. “I—”
At the same time, RJ brushed her hands down the front of her red dress. She looked stunning, and I threw thanks out to Lola, who had insisted that no one wear black. RJ’s dress hugged her curves more than her normal outfits, and I was transfixed. “Well—”
“I was wondering if you had plans after. Maybe we could grab a drink?” I glanced at my watch out of habit more than anything. The reception would wrap up by nine, and I’d been imagining how RJ and I might spend the rest of the night after first seeing her in that dress. I would not bring up the dream or that heated moment if she didn’t want to talk about it, not that I was having any success pushing either out of my thoughts.
