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“Even if Ididthink there was potentially something between us…” I paused, needing to be careful with my words. “What am I supposed to do, Janessa? How would it look? Everyone would say you were too young and that I was taking advantage of you.”
“Cade doesn’t seem to think I’m too young.”
Her words hit me like a punch to the gut, but I somehow managed to keep from flinching. If I was being honest, I didn’t mind the thought of sharing with Cade. We’d tried it a few times before in the past and, yeah, it had been fun. But her words were just a reminder that right now weweren’tsharing. Cade was going after what he wanted, and I was just making things harder for myself.
“Maybe I’ll go upstairs and ask him now,” she said, starting to move past me. “Maybeheknows how to treat a woman when—”
She never had a chance to finish whatever she’d been about to say. I was on my feet, pulling her into my arms and pressing my lips against hers with a movement so quick that I think it surprised both of us.
Because, yeah, she was free to do whatever she wanted—even if that included going upstairs to Cade’s room right now. I wouldn’t try to stop her. But I was going to make it clear to her that Cade wasn’t the only one who cared about her. Not by a long shot.
“I know how to treat a woman,” I said, taking a step back before I completely lost control and gave into what both of us obviously wanted. “Just so we’re clear on that.”
She swayed on her feet for a moment, then smiled. “I know you do. So why are you fighting it? You, me, Cade… you have to admit it would be good. Better than good. Amazing.”
She was right. I had no doubt it would be amazing. And addictive. I’d probably never want to leave her bed.
“It’s not that easy,” I said, shaking my head. “I wish it was. Hell, I’d take you right here on the porch if I could, but… I can’t. It’s complicated.”
“It doesn’t have to be,” she said, taking a step forward to close the distance between us again. “It doesn’t have to be complicated at all. We could all three have what we wanted. We could all be happy. It seems pretty easy to me.”
I hesitated, letting my eyes drop to roam over her. Even fully clothed, I could still easily imagine what she would look like naked, her beautiful body just inches away from mine.
Fuck, it was tempting.
And it would be easy to give in. It would be easy to push my past and all the complicated feelings that went along with it aside and just enjoy everything she was offering me tonight. But then what would happen tomorrow? Or the next day?
I’d still have to work my way through those feelings sometime.
“It sounds easy,” I admitted. No point in denying it. “But… I can’t. I’m sorry.”
“I understand,” she said, but the disappointment in her tone was easy to hear. “You don’t need to apologize.” She stood there for another few seconds, then smiled. “I think I’ll try to get back to sleep. I’m glad we had this talk.”
I nodded. “See you in the morning.”
She walked away, and I heard the door open and close again behind me as I sat back down in the chair. It was completely quiet again, just like it had been before.
And I was all alone with my complicated feelings, just like before.
Chapter 10
Janessa
It was three days ago that we found Rebel poisoned in her stall. Three days and two nights of living on edge, constantly watching out the windows, doing everything in shifts just in case the asshole who tried to kill my horse came back.
As I looked around the breakfast table, I wondered if the constant worrying and uncertainty were starting to take their toll. Boone, Cade, and Uncle Justin were all unusually quiet, just keeping their heads down and their eyes on their plates as they pushed around the eggs and bacon I’d cooked for us.
This must be how people felt when they were under siege. That’s what this was, really. It felt like we were being held captive here on the ranch. It was bad enough that the person had come onto our property in the middle of the night and tried to kill one of my animals—but this feeling of being trapped, being watched, of not knowing when or why or how it might happen again… that was the worst part.
“We’re a lively bunch today,” I said, hoping someone would at least look up and make eye contact.
Cade was the first one to respond, of course. I knew he wouldn’t be able to keep that big, easy smile hidden for long. “I’m just enjoying this breakfast,” he said. “Thank you for making it. I’m pretty sure it was Boone’s turn today, though.”
Boone shot him a look that was so quick I would have completely missed it if I hadn’t been watching already. He didn’t look mean or angry, but it wasn’t a lighthearted, easy-going look, either. Just… tense.
“I’ll make it up to you at lunch,” Boone said, finally looking in my direction and giving me a tight smile. “But thank you for stepping in this morning. I honestly just forgot.”
“You had a late night,” I said, remembering our talk on the porch. I’d seen heat in his eyes out there that still made my entire body tingle. And the way he’d kissed me… God, what I wouldn’t give to have another kiss like that. Or better yet, another one from both of them. Yeah, last night had been… intense. “And anyway, it was no big deal. Just eggs and bacon. It’s really the least we can do since you guys have already given up so much of your own time to help us out around here.”
