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“Yeah,” Audrie said. “Did you know about that?”
“Nope. Jessica’s trailer’s right there.” He pointed in the direction of the scene of the crime—or, in this case, the kiss. “It’s right behind my trailer, which has made her almost impossible to avoid over the past week. She always knows when I’m home, so she can just pop in to ask some sort of question.”
“I heard her voice and then Peter’s, and I snuck around the corner. And then there was a scream.”
“A scream?” His eyes widened.
“It turned out to be nothing, but I was worried for a few seconds there. He’d picked her up and was holding her, and I guess she freaked out a little. When he set her down, they kissed.”
“Weird,” he said.
“Would we expect anything more from Jessica?”
“Not really. This is an interesting development. I wish it had developed a week ago. It would have saved all of us some trouble.”
Doubtful. After the way he’d thrown her under the bus to his brother, she already knew that Jessica had done the two of them a favor. Thanks to her, it was now clear that in time Landon would let her down just as every man always did, and she’d be left standing there, fighting to save the relationship. Alone.
“I’m sorry,” Landon said.
The weird thing about his sudden statement was that it matched what she’d been thinking but not what they’d been talking about. It was like he’d seen her feelings in her expression.
He took a step closer, but not too close. “I want to make it right. I messed up, and I’ll never forgive myself if I can’t make up for it.”
Audrie nodded. “Look, I’ve been down this road before. I’ve had relationships with guys who went in all gangbusters at the start, and then suddenly, when things got serious, everything changed, and I was left looking like some sort of stalker. All because I missed the memo that our relationship had abruptly ended. I can’t do that again. It just would never work.”
His eyes narrowed slightly, and he tilted his head. “Why couldn’t it work?”
“I mean, you live in California, and I live here. There’s no point. You may say you’ll give it all up and move to Corbin, but when it comes down to it, you’ll decide California is where you really belong. Or maybe you’ll end up buying a ranch in Oklahoma or South Dakota.”
That was a random choice of states, but the truth was, there was no shortage of ranches all over this side of the country. And on top of that, there was a limited number of them that would be suitable for starting a new ranch. An even smaller number were in locations he’d want to live in.
“I’m just saving us both a lot of time and heartache,” she said.
She looked down at the pen in her hand. She’d almost forgotten it was there, but she’d been unconsciously gripping it so tight, the stem on the tip had left an indentation in her hand.
Loosening her grip, Audrie returned her gaze to his face. “I’m saving you from having to anguish over moving here for a few months, only to decide in the end you can’t. I’m saving myself from the heartbreak of getting invested in this, only to have you suddenly turn completely cold on me.”
“Is that what you think?” he asked. “You think I’m the type of person who would string you along for a few months and then suddenly…” He hesitated, then said, “Turn cold? That’s not me at all.”
The pain in his eyes was visible even from here. The last thing she wanted to do was hurt him. She told herself this was for the best. The pain now was only a fraction of what it would be if they continued seeing each other.
“But you just met me,” he said. “There are a lot of things you don’t know about me. I miss my dad every minute of every day, and I miss my mom, too, even though I can call her or even show up on her doorstep anytime. I miss the family we had.”
He took another tentative step toward her, and she fought the urge to take a step back. Not because she didn’t want him close to her. But because she did.
“When I’m with you, I can see a future where I have a ranch of my own again and an even stronger family unit than I had growing up. It might be too early to say that, but I can’t let you think I’m one of those wishy-washy guys who starts every relationship strong and then backs off. That’s not me at all.”
In the silence that followed, her mind was spinning. Had she read him wrong all along? Or maybe this wasn’t about him at all. Maybe this was simply fear. Maybe her past relationships had made her so gun shy she’d never be able to have a relationship again. Never be able to fall in love.
She’d die alone. But she’d have avoided heartbreak. Would it be worth it?
“I’ve had relationships, but none have been serious enough to have me thinking about my future,” he said, his tone even more solemn. “I’ve never had the feeling I had with you from almost the start. Before I messed everything up. Every day with you, I learned something new. And I even opened up with you more than I ever had with any woman before.”
Sighing, he took a couple of steps back and looked around. He glanced over at the table, scattered with paperwork, and for a long moment, she was sure he was about to put an abrupt end to this conversation. But then he spoke again.
“I realize I have a lot to work on. And I want to work on that for you.”
The silence that followed felt heavy, like it was creating a wall between them. Audrie wanted to break down that wall, but she kept thinking about her past two relationships. At the start, they’d both made all kinds of promises. Sure, they hadn’t been this open and honest, but she’d definitely had guys tell her they weren’t like other guys and assure her that she was just scared.
