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Suddenly she understood why bikers had a reputation for taking chances—how could you not? You were in the world, almost in a Zen way, and part of it, and it was part of you, and yes, bad things could happen, but they didn’t prey on your mind. The joy of the moment was as powerful an emotion as love itself. And here she was in love with the moment.
All that came from this magical machine that throbbed sensually between her legs and from men who radiated the sense they wanted, even cherished her. That was scary. She was sure she should fight what she was feeling for Max and Rafe, if she were smart.
Still, those feelings grew throughout the day. Over lunch at a restaurant on a pier, a place made of weathered wood, where they sat outside and smelled the salt air and listened to the screech of seagulls as they ate, she learned a bit more about them and let them see a little more inside her life.
“Tell me about the Marines. You loved the Marines,” she said to Rafe.
“And it got fucked up.”
She frowned. “What happened?”
“What do you mean?”
“I heard pain in your voice when you told me that. Some hurt you aren’t over.” She saw Max nod.
He sighed, and she waited, watching Rafe as he gathered his thoughts. “It’s like Brad told you. He told the truth. I got kicked out. A dishonorable discharge.”
“What did you do?”
“Nothing, although they thought I did. I was convicted of something I didn’t do. The military justice system is peculiar, insular. I tried to play the system, and it bit me on the ass, and I got tossed out for something someone else did.”
“He was fucked,” said Max succinctly.
“That isn’t fair.”
“No. And it’s something that I’ll always regret. Like you said, it hurts.” Rafe shrugged, looking relatively carefree, save for the grooves around his mouth.
“And something that can’t be changed or erased?” asked Simone.
Rafe shook his head. “I didn’t take the possibility of getting convicted seriously enough. I believed truth would win out—I was wrong, and I paid for it.”
“Guys like us… Truth is never a match for perception,” said Max as he sipped a soda.
“What did you do? Your job, I mean.”
“I worked with computers. From basics to sophisticated programming, they sent me to school to learn it all. They were grooming me as a cyber security person. I was supposed to stay in a few extra years to pay them back—and I would have done that gladly if I’d been allowed to.”
“Their loss and Kings’ gain. My gain,” said Max, smacking his friend on the shoulder in a comforting way.
“My sister loves computers. It’s one of the few joys in her life, I think,” Simone whispered.
“We’d be happy to share some of what we know with her,” said Max, and Rafe nodded.
Simone considered the offer, realizing they meant well. “You haven’t even met her. Let’s see how she takes to you. Her emotions can be flighty and unpredictable with other people.”
“But with you?” asked Max.
“Well, she can get angry with me and lose patience, but I have to be the rock. I’m not allowed to show my frustration.”
Max touched her arm, and she felt his calmness radiate through her. “That must be hard—being so constant. It would be an easier burden if it were shared.”
It was a simple statement but one that alarmed her. Was he really proposing what it sounded like? She glanced at Rafe, who seemed to be in full agreement with what Maxmightbe suggesting. She had to be careful about reading things into a simple observation. It hadn’t necessarily been a promise of help. Assuming was dangerous.
Tread softly.
“What about you?” she asked Max. “I already know you’re taking care of your sister. Your mother was sick with cancer, right?”
“Same as yours.” He scowled. “Fuck cancer.”
