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Groaning, I grab one of her pillow shams and smack her in the face with it. “It wasn’t like that. He walked me home. A girl he hooked up with lives on my floor and saw us at my door. She started spouting some nasty stuff, and Murphy looked completely exhausted. We literally just slept in my bed together last night and had a hot and heavy make-out session this morning that may have involved a hand down my pajama bottoms.”
“Under the shirt action?” Chloe smiles like the devil she is and leans up on one elbow.
“Jesus, Chloe.” I knock her arm down. “Missing the point of the story here. Anyway, he mentioned something about next time, and I guess I freaked a little.” I take another deep breath, then admit, “Maybe more like a lot.”
Chloe sits back up. Her hazel eyes are sparkling with mischief. She starts ticking things off on her fingers. “Let me get this straight. Aiden Murphy, the ginger giant, slept in your teeny tiny bed last night. He didn’t try anything ungentlemanly, he just slept. Then this morning, you two had a hot and heavy make-out session where he what? Finger-banged you? And then you got tongue-tied and bitchy because he said he wanted to see you again? Am I warm here, Brina? Cause I’ve used up all my fingers. Maybe not as good as Murphy, but...” She lets the rest of the statement die when she sees the sad look on my face.
Oh, God. When she puts it that way, it sounds even worse.
Closing my eyes, I nod my head and then quickly sit up. I look at her and whisper. “I may have called him a man whore too.”
Chloe’s smile grows wider. “Sabrina, you’re not going to like what I’m about to tell you.
You better be ready to apologize because you fucked up.”
Screeching so loudly, dogs down the street should be able to hear me, I answer my best friend. “I fucked up? Are you fucking kidding me? I fucked up, she says. Like this is some big news.” I stand up and start pacing her room. “I told you I fucked up. He was sweet and sexy. He smelled great, and I came fucking hard, Chloe. He lit me up and calmed me down. I fucking know I fucked up. What I don’t fucking know is how to fucking fix it.”
Chloe is laughing her ass off at me, and I have the overwhelming urge to smother her with the damn pillow she’s holding. “Why do you have so many fucking pillows on your bed?” I throw one at her.
“That’s a whole lotta fucks coming from you, Brina.” She holds the pillow in front of herself like a shield to stop me from attacking.
Crossing the room, I slip my feet back into my black ballet flats and head for the door. With my hand on the knob, I turn around and look at my bestie, who’s enjoying this way too much and announce, “I love you, but you are of no help. I’ll call you later.”
“Sabrina,” she calls out, stopping me. “Get on your knees.”
“What the hell are you talking about?”
“When you apologize to Murphy, drop to your knees and show him how sorry you are. He won’t be able to remember why he’s so pissed in the first place.” She looks completely serious for the first time since I told her what happened.
Damn.
Curtly nodding my head at her, I shut the door behind me. I hate the idea of using sex as a tool. I hate the idea she’s probably right, and it would probably work. But I had the man I’ve been half in love with for the last six years in my bed last night, and I fucked up.
If I have to get on my knees to ask for forgiveness, I’m willing to give it a try.
What do I have to lose?
He already took another little piece of my heart with him when he left this morning.
* * *
Dear Cooper.
Belle is helping me write you this letter. Did you see the Kings game yesterday? We won. Declan threw for three touch downs and ran in two more. It was so cool. Me and Belle watched the Kroydon Crusaders game online Saturday too. She painted her nails like she always does, and it smelled. They won too.
We miss you. Belle and me sent you cookies today. Hope they don’t break before they get to you. They taste better when they’re not broken.
Love you,
Tommy David Harte
* * *
Hey Buddy.
I miss you too. Make sure to tell your sister I said thanks for helping you with your letter. It’s the best one I’ve gotten. I haven’t been able to watch any games yet. Can you believe it? They have us working really hard and aren’t leaving us any time for fun. I got the cookies, and guess what? Not a single one was broken. My friends were so jealous that I had to share with them too.
How’s school going? Are you being good for Belles? Listen to what she says, okay?
